[Lizzie1813]

Is anyone else super sensitive? I get upset really quickly if I feel like someone is criticizing or rejecting me. Any advice on how to be less sensitive?

Thank you.

[Yaowen]

Dear Lizzie1813,

I am super sensitive too.

What helps me is having an area of my life that I am proud of and is untouchable by others. For example, I live to try to help people who are suffering from severe depression. This gives great meaning to my life. Some people have told me that they even thought that my words helped save their life.

I figure that saving even a single human life is one of the if not the greatest thing a human being can accomplish in life. In having this mission in life, I am content to let other aspects of my life slide. My relationships are not ideal. I could be wiser, braver, more ambitious, more successful and so on. But I let these goals slide since my main goal is helping others.

When people criticize me or reject me for this or that reason, I realize that these actions do not touch the core of my meaning in life. This enables me to take a "so what" attitude to the negativity that others direct towards me. As long as I have something that gives my life meaning, that core is basically untouchable.

This seems to help me to be less sensitive to negativity directed towards me. I still get upset, but when I think about my mission in life, it puts things in perspective and I tend to calm down.

I think that perhaps many people do not have a sense of perspective when it comes to things. They treat all weaknesses and mistakes as equal when they can never be equal. For example, a couple of men in the last 100 years caused the destruction of tens of millions of men, women and children through genocide and campaigns of forced starvation. I know that I have not caused the destruction of tens of millions of people or millions or hundreds of thousands or tens of thousands or thousands or hundreds of people and so on. So I consider the things people criticize me for to be pretty minor in the grand scheme of things.

I once watched a parent criticizing a child for picking his nose in public. What got me was that this parent was treating this child as though picking his nose was equivalent to causing genocide. How ridiculous. I'm not saying that picking one's nose in public is necessarily a great thing. But it is not "bad" in the same way as causing the destruction of tens of millions of people is bad.

These kinds of thoughts help me to be less sensitive to the negativity of others. Hopefully others here will see your post and share what helps them. Being sensitive is a heavy burden to carry. It can be a crushing weight sometimes. I hope you find things that help you. Sorry that I could not be helpful to you!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Yes, I'm pretty sensitive. We've worked on it in therapy (ok, my therapist worked, I resisted but the result was the same) and I'm better now. I still feel guilty often for things that aren't my fault and I feel left out of things sometimes. I think partly I"ve learned to cover it better and partly I've learned to handle it better.

[sarahsweets]

Originally Posted by Lizzie1813

Is anyone else super sensitive? I get upset really quickly if I feel like someone is criticizing or rejecting me. Any advice on how to be less sensitive?

Thank you.

I’m sensitive as well. Mine manifests it self in tears. I cry when I’m happy, sad, touched, angry. It’s frustrating because I know other people can assume it’s some kind of ploy.

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[FluffyDinosaur]

Yes, I am very sensitive. Not just with interpersonal stuff but other things as well. I wish I could just cry about it, but unfortunately I have issues expressing my emotions, so it usually manifests as irritability. People just see what's on the surface and don't know that I'm really hurting inside, so they usually get irritable back at me and it just ends up making things worse.

I don't know of a great way to deal with it. Sometimes I try to take a step back and think about it more objectively. It may or may not help.

[mssweatypalms]

Hello, Lizzie!

This is a very timely topic for me. I'm also very sensitive recently and I get angry easily when I feel like my ideas are being criticized or questioned. I'm trying really hard not to be upset during my classes. I also want to know what other people here do to address this situation.


What I know for sure is that when I'm not depressed, I'm less sensitive about things. It comes with depression for me.

[sarahsweets]

I mentioned tears when I have any kind of emotion. Does anyone else have that? Do you feel that your body is like betraying you? When I’m trying to make a point and I’m really fired up it’s so frustrating to cry. I feel like people won’t take me seriously.

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[mssweatypalms]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

I mentioned tears when I have any kind of emotion. Does anyone else have that? Do you feel that your body is like betraying you? When I’m trying to make a point and I’m really fired up it’s so frustrating to cry. I feel like people won’t take me seriously.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I do. I hate that when I'm really angry, I become teary and start shaking and crying. I feel like when people look at me, they don't see anger and start to pity me. Like nooo! That's not what I want to show.

[FluffyDinosaur]

Originally Posted by mssweatypalms

Hello, Lizzie!

This is a very timely topic for me. I'm also very sensitive recently and I get angry easily when I feel like my ideas are being criticized or questioned. I'm trying really hard not to be upset during my classes. I also want to know what other people here do to address this situation.

What I know for sure is that when I'm not depressed, I'm less sensitive about things. It comes with depression for me.

I agree, being extra sensitive to rejection or criticism can be a depressive symptom. It is for me, sometimes.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by Yaowen

These kinds of thoughts help me to be less sensitive to the negativity of others. Hopefully others here will see your post and share what helps them. Being sensitive is a heavy burden to carry. It can be a crushing weight sometimes. I hope you find things that help you. Sorry that I could not be helpful to you!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

Thank you for your reply. I wish I felt like I had a purpose in life. It used to be taking care of my children and making sure they felt loved, but they’re grown now and don’t need me like that anymore. Your purpose of helping others with severe depression is wonderful. You’re right in saying that sensitivity is a heavy burden to carry. Thank you again.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

Yes, I'm pretty sensitive. We've worked on it in therapy (ok, my therapist worked, I resisted but the result was the same) and I'm better now. I still feel guilty often for things that aren't my fault and I feel left out of things sometimes. I think partly I"ve learned to cover it better and partly I've learned to handle it better.

I haven’t worked on this in therapy, but I should. I’ve just been so consumed with missing my son that it’s all I’m capable of talking about. I’ve always felt left out, too, like I never really belong. I’m glad you’ve learned to handle it better.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

I’m sensitive as well. Mine manifests it self in tears. I cry when I’m happy, sad, touched, angry. It’s frustrating because I know other people can assume it’s some kind of ploy.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I cry, too. I always have since I was little. I wish I knew how to process my emotions better. Maybe that would help.

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

I mentioned tears when I have any kind of emotion. Does anyone else have that? Do you feel that your body is like betraying you? When I’m trying to make a point and I’m really fired up it’s so frustrating to cry. I feel like people won’t take me seriously.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I hate crying, I absolutely hate it- mainly because when I cry, it isn't a few tears, it's a river of tears, and also because when I cry, it's usually not that sad (I mean it is for me, but in reality...)

when I was younger, my mother took me to a cafe called the happy chef. we had sausages, chips, and a cola

I started crying soon as I put the cola down (really going for it)

people stared, some even asking what's wrong?

what was wrong was that I'd finished my coke and it was time to leave

even when my mother said we'll come back tomorrow, I still cried

I hate how much I cry, and then how much I just sit around crying, going oh I miss such and such so so much

and then the really odd bit?

I'd attempt to remmidy it by repeating the activity that's making me sad, and even though I'm crying going I'm missing it, I'm missing it etc, I'll do it and not care for it

that's what makes it weird

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by FluffyDinosaur

Yes, I am very sensitive. Not just with interpersonal stuff but other things as well. I wish I could just cry about it, but unfortunately I have issues expressing my emotions, so it usually manifests as irritability. People just see what's on the surface and don't know that I'm really hurting inside, so they usually get irritable back at me and it just ends up making things worse.

I don't know of a great way to deal with it. Sometimes I try to take a step back and think about it more objectively. It may or may not help.

I get irritable, too. I especially do it with my cousin when she’s being critical. And then she gets mad which makes me feel guilty.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by mssweatypalms

What I know for sure is that when I'm not depressed, I'm less sensitive about things. It comes with depression for me.

This makes perfect sense to me. I hadn’t realized that worsened sensitivity could be a sign of depression, but I agree. I am depressed right now so yeah that makes sense.

[Fuzzybear]

I also am very sensitive, especially when depressed. Sometimes this is expressed as irritability, which people have misunderstood. They then usually are angry with me. Some irl have rejected me, I'm sensitive to rejection too. I think some of those people are ''not sensitive enough''

Thanks for this thread Lizzie.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

I mentioned tears when I have any kind of emotion. Does anyone else have that? Do you feel that your body is like betraying you? When I’m trying to make a point and I’m really fired up it’s so frustrating to cry. I feel like people won’t take me seriously.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes, I cry, too. It’s frustrating and embarrassing. I’m on disability now, but when I was working, I sometimes cried when I was criticized.

[MickeyCheeky]

i think i am sensitive to be sure as i can get easily offended. i don't really show my frustration unless it's just too much but i can relate and i am So Sorry you people have to deal with this as well. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to ALL of you, @Lizzie1813, your Families, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[FluffyDinosaur]

Originally Posted by Lizzie1813

I get irritable, too. I especially do it with my cousin when she’s being critical. And then she gets mad which makes me feel guilty.

Yes, it makes me feel guilty, too. Guilty and misunderstood. It just adds insult to injury, making me feel even worse.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I also am very sensitive, especially when depressed. Sometimes this is expressed as irritability, which people have misunderstood. They then usually are angry with me. Some irl have rejected me, I'm sensitive to rejection too.

Thanks for this thread Lizzie.

Yes, rejection is hard for me, too. I just can’t handle it and end up feeling like a child which makes me feel even worse.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Lizzie1813

Thank you for your reply. I wish I felt like I had a purpose in life. It used to be taking care of my children and making sure they felt loved, but they’re grown now and don’t need me like that anymore. Your purpose of helping others with severe depression is wonderful. You’re right in saying that sensitivity is a heavy burden to carry. Thank you again.

I am miserably sensitive. I can hear constructive criticism okay, but I'm sensitive to any pain or suffering I see, whether it's a person, an animal, or a tree.

I have exactly the same challenge as you do with regards to your kids.

[Ursula Shackleton]

Not all the time. When I'm overwhelmed or going through an episode, I get really sensitive. But when I'm stable, little things don't really bother me.

Yes, I'm very sensitive. I cry a lot too. It's embarrassing how easily I cry

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Lizzie1813

Is anyone else super sensitive? I get upset really quickly if I feel like someone is criticizing or rejecting me. Any advice on how to be less sensitive?

Thank you.

That sounds more like borderline issues, once I was told by a counselor I was like a burn victim, I had no skin to protect me, this was a long time ago. I’ve also been told I was a highly sensitive person by a professor .

I’m no longer sensitive to criticism or rejection, however I remain sensitive to sensory overload, bright lights, loud sounds, strong smells.

[FluffyDinosaur]

Originally Posted by leomama

That sounds more like borderline issues, once I was told by a counselor I was like a burn victim, I had no skin to protect me, this was a long time ago. I’ve also been told I was a highly sensitive person by a professor .

I’m no longer sensitive to criticism or rejection, however I remain sensitive to sensory overload, bright lights, loud sounds, strong smells.

You're right, it can be related to borderline, but it can also be a depressive symptom (it's even one of the questions on the IDS), or related to attachment issues, or a bunch of other things. I don't know whether Lizzie1813 is going through a mood episode at the moment, but one of my Pdocs once told me it's generally not a good idea to try and diagnose personality disorders when someone is in the midst of a depression. It's just impossible to get an accurate impression of someone's real personality at a time like that.