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Default May 02, 2022 at 12:40 PM
  #1
Question above, also including schizoaffective bipolar type. Specifically when you realized something was wrong, psychologically, even if you didn't yet know it was bipolar disorder.

Also, what did you initially THINK was wrong? Meaning self-diagnose. Or did you think it was all situational distress?

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Default May 02, 2022 at 12:58 PM
  #2
Wasn’t until I was in my twenties.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 01:07 PM
  #3
I always knew something was off with me by the time I was in my mid to late teens. I sought help in my early 20s and like most I was originally diagnosed with MDD, GAD and a few other oddities here and there. I was in my late twenties when I was diagnosed with BPII, I feel it is the most accurate thing we have on paper -- although some other ideas and diagnoses are still contemplated/on the table. I just thought all my childhood traumas were enough to make me permanently suffer through life and insufferable to others. Finding the right meds and therapy really has made that much of the difference in my life that I'm glad I finally found something that I feel works relatively well. We're still working on discovering ways to help me even now into my 30s.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 01:12 PM
  #4
10 eating disorder. Wasn't DX with sza until last year or two. By 13 I knew I had bipolar. I did think it was situational made it worse. I remember 13 asking my therapist for meds. She said I didn't need meds that I was just a brat without a mental health condition. I quit seeing her after she accused my dad of things.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 02:01 PM
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I started having really visbile issues that couldnt be swept under the rug anymore, the summer between 6th and 7th grade. I got into therapy in January of 2006 when I was 12 and got diagnosed with bipolar in May 2006 when I was 13. I was always a really shy and anxious kid with behavior issues though.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 02:36 PM
  #6
I knew from the age of 13 something was up. But just thought I was a moody teenager with extra moodiness. Then when I was 24 I knew it was depression. It wasn't until I had my first manic episode that I thought wow its crazy. I was diagnosed at 25 after a manic episode and najor depression.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 02:46 PM
  #7
Did not know/understand until my 40s. I thought all my issues were "only" related to childhood trauma and sexual abuse,
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Default May 02, 2022 at 03:35 PM
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From the age of 16, I thought something was up with me. It may have been tied in to the fact that I was the child of an alcoholic. In fact, that's what I thought my symptoms were due to into my late 20s. Also in my mid to late 20s I was diagnosed with peripartum depression and post partum depression. I'd had hallucinations but no one figured out that that's what they were. At 16, I saw a psychiatrist but after one session proclaimed me a "normal teenager". At 33, my primary doctor thought I had PMDD- premenstrual dysphoric disorder- but referred my to psychiatry all the same. That's when I was diagnosed with bipolar NOS which turned into bipolar 1.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 03:58 PM
  #9
I was 15. I was always an anxious child but strange behavior started occurring around this age.
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Default May 02, 2022 at 04:16 PM
  #10
I take that back, I was a freshman (18) at the U when I had my first depression. I was standing on top of a bridge when a cop came a long. He drove me back to campus and told me to talk to someone. Went to the campus center and they told me to think happier thoughts. That was the extent of help back then. Heh flower power! ☮️ then two years later I talked to a friend and she said it was alcohol, I was a college student and everyone drank. Of course they wanted my money for the program and said I was an alcoholic. Went though the whole program confused and at the end I had to take a mmpi and they were so worried. Said I was suicidal depressed and I did some fast talking and walked out. They let me cause I was dressed nice. Then when I was 27 I got my first T because the ER refereed me after I’d been beaten up by my then husband. That T caught it. So on reflection it was late teens.

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Default May 02, 2022 at 04:51 PM
  #11
I had PTSD (since 12) before the schizoaffective (16) kicked in. I knew I was struggling with insomnia since 12 but I didn't think I had any form of mental illness other than just being stressed out and insomniac. I was probably 18 when I was able to see why I needed treatment.

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Default May 03, 2022 at 12:05 AM
  #12
I was 5 when I knew something wasn't okay with me. I knew it and it scared me. It had to do with the light changing (the natural light from the sky). I noticed that the bright sunlight caused me to feel "spinny" and the late afternoon light caused me to "sink" in that place between my chest and stomach (that's still how I know whether or not an AD is working or not, that sinking place). And some other things...terrible rushes of rage that were paralyzing, for example.

Before I was 6 my family life was secure and safe, so environment wasn't causing the problems. That's why I tell mental healthcare people that I am sure I was born with bipolar disorder.

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Default May 03, 2022 at 08:42 AM
  #13
I've only just been diagnosed at 52 although I've known for most of life that there was something not quite right. My mood swings have always been very severe but my manic episodes were never that severe. I always though I was just a moody so and so with a vicious temper. I guess it would be called Cyclothymia now. It wasn't until a course of SSRI's for the depressive episodes triggered more extreme mania that I was finally taken seriously and given a working diagnosis of Bipolar 2
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Default May 03, 2022 at 11:50 PM
  #14
I was a carefree child full of life and energy until the abuse started at age 7. Lasted til I ran away from home at 17 and never looked back! The self harming and si thoughts started at 15 but I was already an anxious kid and depressed before then. By age 20 I was dxd with bp 2. At 18 during my first MIW (72 hour hold) they had said I just had major depression. By age 33 I was diagnose with sza bp type. The psychosis was the worse it had been and I was cycling moods during my 24 day stay ip.

I’ve had ECT, meds, lots of ip visits, 3suicide attempts and EMDR before finding my stability two years ago.

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Default May 04, 2022 at 01:16 AM
  #15
Possible trigger:
, that's when I started having major mental health issues

Wasn't diagnosed with Bipolar/schizoaffective until I was 19 years old though.

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Default May 05, 2022 at 10:10 PM
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(Trigger warning) Since anxiety and depression have been there most of my life, the realization did not set in until my thirties. (Apparently, I am a little slow) My parents were not into labels and not into mental health related things. When I tried committing suicide at 25, my mom helped bandage me up before work. (did not click and I had no idea I felt that way. It was so spontaneous.) Had first (hypomanic/manic) episode at 28 ( nope, not yet) My mom passes in my early thirties. When I go to my physician for something else, they asked me to join an outpatient program (again). In the program, the psychiatrist asked me why I am not on my medicine (prescribed at 28) and said I could die if I don’t take it. ( started clicking…this isn’t going away!) :-(
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Default May 06, 2022 at 02:17 AM
  #17
At 14 or 15 years old, I kind of knew I had some sort of diagnosable mental health disorder beyond depression and anxiety, which I experienced probably since 12. I remember wondering if I had schizophrenia, which ended up not being the case. My first therapy was at 15, but it was short-lasting (a story in itself). The same feeling occurred to me at 20 years old when I was referred to a university psychiatrist (the first psychiatrist I ever saw). He wrongly prescribed Prozac even though I complained of symptoms that were clearly bipolar ones related to mixed episodes. Often when my hypomanias and even mania were elated, I had no insight into them. Just when mixed.

I was formally diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 32, but ignored it until my first psych hospitalization at 34. A large percentage of my 30s were God awful years, in terms of my bipolar disorder.

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Default May 06, 2022 at 07:25 AM
  #18
I was 9 when I made my first sui attempt.

Possible trigger:


I remember afterwards so many people saying how many 9 year olds could know what they are doing- how many 9 years olds could take it as seriousls you did.
initially, I just thought it was because of my mother's physical abuse

but oh how wrong I was..
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Default May 08, 2022 at 08:15 PM
  #19
I was first diagnosed in my twenties with major depression and anxiety. Later I was diagnosed with bipolar 2. Needless to say, my twenties were awful.

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Default May 15, 2022 at 11:14 AM
  #20
Well I am 70 years old but to be honest I really don't feel like I have mental illness now but it has been a long strange trip. I remember being in the 3rd grade and laying awake at night and worrying about worrying. I had stomach x-rays in the 4th grade because the doctor thought I might have an ulcer. It was around this time also when I was the last one to go to bed one evening and when I was leaving the front room I started hearing very distincting this real heavy breathing coming from behind the sofa but the sofa was right next to the wall so nobody could of been behind it. I went to my parent's bedroom and knock on the door and my mom came out and walked with me back to the front room but there was no sound at all then. She told me that I was just imagining hearing something and just go to bed.,
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