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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 73,974
(SuperPoster!)
14 57.3k hugs
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#21
Today is supposed to be my lazy day, Sunday. The day I don’t get dressed and don’t do anything but veg out. But it is such a glorious rocking autumn day, I got dressed and did outside stuff. Threw two patio flowers in the garbage as they were gone, but the rest are doing ok. My flower box is doing fantastic. The marigolds are huge and showy. That miracle grow flower food is really good stuff. My mood is likewise fantastic. Amazing how much influence nature has.
Hugs and sparkling good vibes all around. ✨ __________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
Aurelius710, bizi, Fuzzybear, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Aurelius710, Polibeth, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,557
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#22
I have had as much fun as I can have for the time being. Golfing was fun. I didn’t come in last or even second to last thankfully. I’m packing tonight and leaving tomorrow to head to the mountains. It will take as long as it takes to get things straight and clear. I will likely not be posting but I will be around.
I wish everybody well. I’ll be seeing you around. Take care. |
Aurelius710, bizi, Mountaindewed, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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Aurelius710, bizi, Nammu, Polibeth, Soupe du jour, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 38,791
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,763 hugs
given |
#23
Quote:
Still at 99.5 so thats not getting worse but I feel worse. I totally understand if I have to move my last in person session with my therapist to virtual. But man is that like transference T part 2 and the sudden switch to video sessions in 2020. Thats a mind blown. History repeating itself or some ****. My temp is ok but my throat hurts so badly and this cough sucks and now I have a headache. It feels like when you get butterflys in your stomach but mine are in my lungs and throat. __________________ I'm Blue Last edited by Mountaindewed; Oct 09, 2022 at 06:58 PM.. |
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bizi, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Bizi is bizi
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: cajun country
Posts: 11,014
18 45.8k hugs
given |
#24
I am sorry you are ill.could be the flu or covid.Wait a couple of days to see if you improve then test if you don't improve. The walk in clinics can give you predinisone to help with your symptoms for a few days flo nace is good stuff for sinus, runny nose cough related to post nasal drip.
bizi __________________ lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Mountaindewed
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,557
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#25
I am a people pleaser and I’m very good at it. The person that I’m not pleasing is myself. I don’t know the status of the relationships in my life right now. Neither do I care. I have a good friend who always tells me like it is. I can’t even turn to him right now. I’ve withdrawn too far into myself at this time. Am I safe? No. What I am is tired and weary. Tired of pretending. Tired of being the broad shoulders that everyone counts on. Tired of being the nice one. Always. If I could I would just leave and start over fresh out of state. Alone. I’m so very, very tired. I think some peace and quiet in the mountains will do me some good. I’m not going to meet M. I just asked to be left alone. A dark night of the soul for sure. I’m not taking anything that would not be in my best interest as I don’t trust myself at this time.
I’ll either work through it or I won’t. I’ll either be back or I won’t. I do sincerely appreciate all the support I’ve received here. I think as a group you are truly phenomenal. Please take care. |
Aurelius710, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Soupe du jour
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bizi, ~Christina
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Bizi is bizi
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: cajun country
Posts: 11,014
18 45.8k hugs
given |
#26
Quote:
bring your phone but turn it off. that way you have it for emergencies. Even if it is just for a day or weekend. It is time to take care of yourself. Bring simple things to eat fresh fruits and veggies that you can eat easily. Make a vow of silence for a day or the whole weekend. Have you ever journaled? It is a great way to get down on paper how you are doing. Have you ever meditated? That is a way to center yourself. What about a hike in the mountains or woods.I am sure there are trails that you could walk if you are able.. I am worried about you. (((((HUGS))))) bizi __________________ lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
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Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 38,791
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,763 hugs
given |
#27
After some tylenol didn't help, I tried an Advil 3 hours later and fell asleep into a light doze. My dumb brother woke me up less then 2 hours later. I feel awful. I took my temp and it was 100.1. So I think I'll go over to immediate care in the morning. Based on the severity of my sore throat, I can barely drink anything, I'm guessing I have strep or something.
__________________ I'm Blue |
BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Moose72, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
13 12.7k hugs
given |
#28
Quote:
Praying for you Enjoy the peace you find in the mountains and give yourself some grace. Much love Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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bizi, Sunflower123
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bizi, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Bizi is bizi
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: cajun country
Posts: 11,014
18 45.8k hugs
given |
#29
Quote:
feel better! bizi __________________ lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
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Mountaindewed, Sunflower123
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,557
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#30
I had a melt down last night. I’m sorry if I worried or scared you. For the record, the diatribe was not about my fiancée who is a good man and better to me than I deserve. There are a few relationships in my life that involve spontaneous and frequent cruelty. One I have addressed. The other, society views as taboo to terminate. Maybe a temporary estrangement as this time? I don’t know. Every time I try to think of solutions I grow exhausted and need to sleep immediately. I’ve tried to live up to other’s expectations but when they keep moving the goal post it’s a hard mantle to bear. I’ve had to accept that some things just can’t be resolved. Sometimes love is not enough. The tears are gone as is the brutal pain and new resolve has taken root. My mental and physical health is my first priority. It has to be.
I think the continued demands of me and the loss of sleep over what is happening outside my home created a perfect storm yesterday. I am at the secluded cabin in my beloved mountains now and I am starting to feel better. Human again. No demands. I’ve got the fireplace going and I’m about to go out in this frigid weather to enjoy the hot tub. Lovely. When it warms a bit, I’ll start the hike to my favorite spot. My private messages are activated and my ignore list is clear at this time. The day after I arrive home, whenever that may be, I’m leaving for a week and a half to go north to take mom to see her sisters. That will be good. It’s peaceful there. I’ll get into another grief class and I will grieve the fractured relationship as much as the one I lost (my brother). Down but not out. Always. I hope everyone has a peaceful day. Much love. |
Aurelius710, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Mountaindewed, Nammu
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Aurelius710, bizi, ~Christina
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Member
Member Since Mar 2013
Posts: 443
11 |
#31
Quote:
Hope you feel better soon. You could possibly be getting sick so often because you’re not eating enough. It wears down your bodies immunity. |
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bizi
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*Beth*, Mountaindewed
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,634
9 1,680 hugs
given |
#32
Quote:
Moving on, it's gonna be another lazy day today. I meet my PsychNP at 2pm and (if my Dad is going to go to my cousin's place), I'm going to say hi to Mom at her house. See if the two of us can talk shop. __________________ "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." -Litany Against Fear (Dune) |
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Nammu
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 38,791
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,763 hugs
given |
#33
I woke up this morning around 7. Way later then normal. I felt like crap and knew I needed to go to immediate care. I had a temp of 99.5 and I had the cough and this weird fluttering in my chest. So I got to immediate care and I had a 99 fever and a oxygen of 94. I tested negative for the 5 minute strep test. She did a flu covid combo test and told me to avoid social gatherings until I got the results. I am home in bed now. I took my temp about half an hour ago after feeling worse and it was back up to 100. I've been told before I get sick either because of my diet or thats how my body reacts to stress. But tbh my anxiety hasn't been too bad yesterday and today. I'm not in panic mode about this I'm pretty chill about it. The prestiq seems to still be working pretty well for my anxiety.
I sent an email to my therapist asking if we could reschedule for in person on Friday. I know theres a lot going on with her and I want to be 100% by the time we meet. Hopefully she has something or she is even ok with me being in the office at all. But I get if she is not and prefers virtual. __________________ I'm Blue Last edited by Mountaindewed; Oct 10, 2022 at 11:15 AM.. |
BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Sunflower123
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 73,974
(SuperPoster!)
14 57.3k hugs
given |
#34
Today is World Mental Health Day! October 10th 2022. 🌎
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Brentus, Fuzzybear, ~Christina
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,662
(SuperPoster!)
9 11.9k hugs
given |
#35
I need to have a chat conversation with my cousin who has had cancer before to get her information for my genetics counseling appointment that is later this week. I don't want to. I didn't realize this until I left therapy and can't talk about it more. I just haven't told almost anyone about my breast biopsies, surgery or very elevated risk. I found a support group for high-risk women and I can't even post anonymously there. I don't know why it's so big for me to share this but it is. And my cousin is wonderful but I'm not ready to have that conversation yet. I have a few days before genetic counseling so hopefully I'll feel more like it tomorrow.
__________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
*Beth*, bizi, Fuzzybear, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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*Beth*, ~Christina
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Bizi is bizi
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: cajun country
Posts: 11,014
18 45.8k hugs
given |
#36
__________________ lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
*Beth*, Fuzzybear
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*Beth*, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
13 12.7k hugs
given |
#37
I got a call today from one of the applications I filled out. I’m calling back tomorrow. I hope I hope I hope. It’s not an ideal job at all but it’s a job and I’ll be grateful no matter the days or hours.
We got our first cold snap of the year. My trees are starting to turn. I hope to get some pics tomorrow. Hugs and love to anyone in need ! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
*Beth*, bizi, Fuzzybear, HALLIEBETH87, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, wildflowerchild25
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*Beth*, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 73,974
(SuperPoster!)
14 57.3k hugs
given |
#38
Trees here have already turned I think it’s 50-75% finished. Today when I took mum to her physical therapy I drove the back way so she could see all the colors. Most houses around here have the pumpkins out, and corn decorations up.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
bizi, Fuzzybear, Sunflower123
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,557
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#39
Quote:
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bizi, Nammu
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Nammu
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,557
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#40
Quote:
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bizi
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~Christina
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