Bipolar Check-in #83

We already hit 50 pages on the last check-in! Here's a new one.

I'll link to this on the old one and ask that the old one be closed.

So when everyone is telling you to relax. They're treating you like your manic but you can't keep your medicine down what are you to do? Im seeing my t weekly and pdoc every other week.

I’m in bed. Got blood drawn today. My prolactin and liver enzymes are good! Took a few months for the prolactin to go back down after risperdal made it really high.

I could get into pretty big trouble if something happens. My Pdoc would fire me and Idk if I'd end up IP if I needed to go to the ER or if I could make up some excuse like my pain really sucked. Which isn't even an excuse and not somethIng they'd put you in the psych hospital for I don't think.

I'm kinda getting pissed again because I want my therapists attention. She did email me and I do see her on Monday.

I keep hearing stuff too. Last night some cat got into a fight and it was so loud. But theres no like satanic ritual mark or anything.

I know I'm just talking out of my butt again

I think my new Pdoc thinks I’m crazy but he was nice to me

My flight was delayed, so was luggage but I'm back home now.

Since I was traveling alone I didn't have to converse with anyone so I put on my buds, turned on nose cancellation, and enjoyed the calm music. I had no idea until we landed that the flight was done.

@Blueberrybook Sorry I didn't respond to your post earlier. I'm very tired after getting only a few hours of broken sleep. Hoping tonight is better.


You're right, 12.5 mg of Seroquel isn't much. It's most just to take the edge off during the day if I need it without making me sleepy. But when I can't sleep I'll take anything. I've taken more than I'm supposed to once or twice but I'm hesitant to do that with Seroquel both because I'm not sure I'm allowed (I'm allowed to go over my gabapentin) and I don't want to keep upping the Seroquel dose until I'm actually "on Seroquel" again. Getting off it was hard and it wasn't working anymore when I went on clozaril. Clozaril is tough because I can't increase my dose because I get toxic levels if I'm on very much at all. But it works for me so having to deal with this bit of Seroquel is a compromise I can accept. I just don't want to be on several hundred mg of Seroquel.


I do get sedation from a bunch of meds. Gabapentin is probably my biggest sleepy med. Clozaril helps. Klonopin helps a lot. Topirimate may help some. I can't take any other ADs because I'm on an MAOI so I miss out on a lot of the easiest ways to get sedation. But mostly what I have works. I just have bad nights. They are usually occasional but I've had more lately. My anxiety level has been so high this summer. I'm hoping that now my therapist is back that will go down. It will also help to hear from my SSDI review. But that will be a while since I just sent it in.


Anyway, thanks for responding.

@raspberrytorte thanks. I think it's been about a month in the past too. I wish I could remember more. I guess I put these things out of my mind once they are over. Maybe this time I'll write it down somewhere.