Bipolar Check-in #84

My heartburn and anxiety were downright distresful today when I woke up. My new stomach med was just not helping. So I went back on my old one. I called my doctors nurse and told her what was up. I took some dramamine at 10 and then the med at 10:30. I passed out for a bit and then I woke up right before noon feeling so much better.

But I could just not get my heartburn under control even with quitting coffee and taking multiple antacids. And my anxiety was a wreck. I didn't leave my house at all since I started the med.

I've been sleeping all day but my anxiety and stomach are fine. My meds have just knocked me out.

OMG, had a bit of a buying spree, just hope not too terrible. I've already had to buy a ton of cat stuff this morning, have large vet bills, and an upcoming crown for my tooth. I haven't splurged on myself forever but I got a pilates band, a pilates ball and then a SAD lamp to try for my pdoc who thinks it will help my anxiety. We'll see. But I feel guilty spending the money in a tough financial month.

God, I hope this is not hypomania...!

blueberry, not every blip portends an episode. Sounds like those are all needed items, just not the best timing to need them.

I got my flu and covid shots back in Oct, had to issue at all. I think my body has built up an immune response to the vaccine so it’s not such a big deal anymore. I had heard this years flu shot was different from the past years so maybe that’s why no reaction to that one too.

I’ve complained before how hot this building is, I’m starting to feel like a record on repeat. But the heat woke me up before Dawn. It had stopped raining to I opened the window and was able to get back to sleep for a couple hours. Tomorrow the temperature drops outside I hope that keeps it cooler in here.

I did my laundry today, my luck continues to hold. There was nobody in the laundry room the entire time. Yay! This seems to be a good time. Unfortunately the good dyer didn’t work today. Took my money but wouldn’t start. Tomorrow I do sheets. I forgot I wanted to try and get ahold of the social worker. I really miss my email. I need to reach her soon as I need to sus out which advantage plan is best.

Pumpkin Cookies for all.

@Blueberrybook

I see both my therapist and psychiatrist tomorrow, but am just going to mention my anxiety and paranoia have been really bad. No one needs to know I'm soulless.

My CPAP mask has been broken for weeks if not longer. The strap magnet broke off so it no longer seals. Therefore it leaks and probably isn’t doing much. I woke up at 5 am today and have felt tired the whole time. My liver doctor’s nurse doesn’t think Vraylar is increasing my liver enzymes but they want me to get them checked Monday after I see my Pnurse. They said they went up but then back down and wondered what I’d changed. I don’t see the lower results in my portal so I dunno. My new CPAP equipment is on its way! I hope they get here soon. I have to mail back the wrong stuff soon too. They are sending a shipping label.

Raspberry, you are not soulless. Definitely not.

saw to today. i needed it. helped alot. im a lot calmer. ive been taking klonopin nearly daily. idk how else to fall asleep when so anxious like i am

I had such a nice day yesterday i was hoping for a repeat today but my depression came back. My order of frozen meals and my bottle with a mixing ball for protein powder came so i ate better today. But exercise didn't help and neither did spending time in nature. I couldn't tolerate my game or my soaps or music or "Ozark." I feel like i'm just enduring life.

I had a pedicure. I was long overdue. I feel guilty though because I’m still broke since Taking my daughter on a $366 grocery shop because she was broke. Still heard nothing back from the principal regarding my teaching allotment for next year and it’s starting to undo all the work that’s taken me 3 months to achieve. Still have my bloody period and it’s still so darn heavy. I’m going to go anaemic if this continues…..