feel stupid cause what you said and cant make a point

When your at work and you feel like no one likes you and your left out of stuff, so you try to join a conversation and make a point but you talk before you think and you say the stupidest thing or say something that has NOTHING to do with what was said and people look at you like your on drugs (when you are or not). Or you start talking about something with out explaining why you are talking about it so your pulling %#@&#! out of your ***.

They laugh b/c it seems to be going over your head or they ask "what the %#@&#!" and you try to explain were you were going with it but it is obvious that you were trying to hard, mistook what they ment, and went off in the wrong direction. You know that for sure they are going to leave you out of conversations now b/c you seem like an airhead, and dont know what the %#@&#! your talking about.

Kind of like trying to write this... is it that I am just confusing everyone cause I cant organize my thoughts enough to make sense.

How do you fix your image after that?

oh boy this used to happen to me alot and sometimes still does. i think that the self esteem gets crushed -more than it already is, so flip your thoughts (or yourself) on a dime and make funny of it cause everyone gets those moments apparently. put your "i feel so stupid" feeling aside and stop and look at them and admit (like your ok with having a brain fart...lol) and tell them that your embarressed and you say something like "oh sorry i thought i heard something else" you smile and then walk away as though it didn't phase you. and instead of appearing weak, according to them , they will notice that you're not worried about looking like a "fool" so it will make them comfortable to be around you. sort of like a pretend moment but you'll be amazed how will approach you next time then you can loosen up a little, some times when you put yourself out there and it doesn't seem to go so smoothly try mind over matter, don't be afraid of what they think cause those are alot of oppinions being thrown at you. what matters is yours' and make sure it's a positive one or at least try , it does get easier. lt's the beginning of assertivness aand along with that comes courage, strength and self esteem in yourself. it's worth a try but it worked for me. deep breaths, calm and collective. and you know what this gives you a chance to laugh at yourself and when it happens to them, you CAN say "i know what you mean" you'll relate and they'll see you as human.good luck and don't be ashamed of life's little brain fart's, if they don't get it them screw them it don't matter what THEY think,at least you get a chuckle at your expense.

OH this is something that I've been dealing with lately....I feel like suddenly I'm beamed into another dimension and have totally lost the plot and then wonder should I try and redeem myself or should I just go with the fact that everyone now is going to think I'm a little odd..then I finally strug my shoulders and think, oh well if I can at least stay aware of myself at this moment I can not repeat it...but I forget and then repeat it all over again...sigh...I guess we need to have compassion for ourselfs at this times..what else is there left? and those that matter don't mind and those that mind don't matter..

Thank You Shaggy!! Sure is great advice for me lately.

Dear Kdragonsong,

You did a perfect job! Thank You. Lately I can't seem to win. No matter what I say, it's the wrong thing. I'm so glad you posted this & your words say it just right. And I'm going to use Shaggy's advice to counter-act this inept feeling.

Just wanted you to know you aren't alone. Everyone has times when they aren't clear and seem silly. But don't worry because it is normal, especially when we are trying so hard. We tend to think so much about what the people are thinking and end up saying things exactly how we are tying not to.

But if you realize that you aren't the only one and the people you're talking to have done the same thing you can learn to not be so hard on yourself. And when you feel a little more comfortable you'll probably come across more clearly.

I am going thru this same situation at my work, my self esteem is really low which doesn't help my moods, or my self injury. I feel like everyone talks about me and no one understands what i say cuz heck i dont understand what i say anymore.

Hear and understand what you're saying.thank god for the good days.It sux but at least it doesn't stay this way.all the best.