[Trees_Words]

I have had a diverse life. I have lived in a number of different places, done a number of different things, and survived a number of challenges. I was also born with some remarkable gifts of being attractive, intelligent, and a talented communicator. This makes for the dynamic personality that is me. I'm a little bit of everything all rolled into one and I am pretty good at expressing it! I absolutely love animals particularly doggie dogs. I love to read and write. I like to make things crafting is my thing i have a whole room dedicated to it. I also have a lot of causes I'm passionate about, none so much as the plight of the modern soldier. I'm hoping someday to build recovery homes that help them readjust to life and rehabilitate by working with dogs that also need recovery and readjustment.

I have been struggling with depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and self harm since I was in my teens. I've been diagnosed with post traumatic stress since my early twenties and self medicated with marijuana and occasional alcohol until this summer when I decided no more. In my arrogance I cut myself off cold turkey with no therapy or help. Of course life decided not to cooperate and the resulting stress put me into a nasty psychotic state. I lost control of my emotions and went into a series of suicide attempts and commitments ending in the coup-d-grace of taking 3 bottles of pills that landed me in a coma for two days and a six month commitment including a month and a half in a couple of locked down facilities. They didn't do much for me other than discovering the power of dialectical behavior therapy and the ineffectiveness of mood stabilizing medications and inaccuracy of the bi-polar diagnosis they wanted to label me with. One thing did seem to stick and apply, Borderline Personality. Impulsive, intense, uncontrollable emotions fueled by an intense insecurity, overwhelming guilt, and sense of rage.

I'm home now, living with my mom and sister. Without the emotional escape from drugs or alcohol I'm having a difficult time coping with the intensity of my emotions, memories, and the pressure of life and guilt of my actions. I'm hoping this support forum can help me talk to others who understand what it's like to feel this way. Maybe I can help a few people with some of the things I have learned struggling with mental problems.

I have the same threesome as you, except I also have depression which has been kicking my butt lately. If we could help each other, that would be awesome.

[AngelWolf3]

Welcome to PC, I hope you also can find help here! There are lots of people to talk with, learn from, and help as well.

I look forward to hearing more from you...(I understand your threesome all too well, with my added "friend" , the ED...)