[poison0ak]

one of those things to where i always thought i DID have bpd, but i know youre not suppose to diagnose yourself. although, i was right. i do have it. (i just never went to see a psychiatric dr about everything)

im going to php, but yet i cant grasp it. i mean, i understand what theyre saying, but its so frustrating! how is one suppose to change their whole mental view on life that they have had their WHOLE life? :/

as i said, frustrating. which makes me hate myself even more. which makes me want to punish myself even more. which makes me almost slip into this never ending downward spiral.

-.-

Originally Posted by poison0ak

one of those things to where i always thought i DID have bpd, but i know youre not suppose to diagnose yourself. although, i was right. i do have it. (i just never went to see a psychiatric dr about everything)

im going to php, but yet i cant grasp it. i mean, i understand what theyre saying, but its so frustrating! how is one suppose to change their whole mental view on life that they have had their WHOLE life? :/

as i said, frustrating. which makes me hate myself even more. which makes me want to punish myself even more. which makes me almost slip into this never ending downward spiral.

-.-

First I dont' know what php is. Can you elaborate on that? I'm curious

Second I know it's frustrating but dont' think of it as trying change your whole mental view on life all of a sudden or having a magic key to do so. That's just not how it is. It will take time, one step at at a time, you'll overcome different challenges, ways of thinking, controlling your emotions and coping. Even if you just change one small thing at a time, it's still progress which is more than any of us can say about ourselves before we got help!

Hang in there! You'll make it!
*hugs*

[poison0ak]

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

First I dont' know what php is. Can you elaborate on that? I'm curious

Second I know it's frustrating but dont' think of it as trying change your whole mental view on life all of a sudden or having a magic key to do so. That's just not how it is. It will take time, one step at at a time, you'll overcome different challenges, ways of thinking, controlling your emotions and coping. Even if you just change one small thing at a time, it's still progress which is more than any of us can say about ourselves before we got help!

Hang in there! You'll make it!
*hugs*

PHP stands for some type of partial patient at the hospital... basically i have to go 3x a week for 4 hours each day. almost like IOS. its almost like classes where they teach DBT skills and check you in and have a nurse practitioner check your meds... you cant stop going till they discharge you and if you dont go they call your therapist and ask why :P it was my... compromise of being released from being hospitalized. and if i stop going i have to be sent back. ugh -.-

[sallyace]

Boy, do I hear you. I feel the same way. I get angry when someone wants me to change a whole lifetime of functioning the wrong way.

[poison0ak]

its so much easier said than done. those counselors dont understand how it is to deal, how it is to have this mind set, how it is to go through trauma and etc etc.