[duende]

Sorry that I have to vent. So, I don't really know what's going on. I suppose it's partially my fault. I find myself recently doing the same effing thing over and over these days.. I reach out and try to be open with people. Cold shoulder or no response. I mean...Seriously, I have a lot to offer. WTF. I have plenty of interests. I care. I seriously shouldn't have to explain this. But...haha! For some reason I'm finding that no one seems to really reach out back. WTF did I ever do wrong to deserve getting ignored like this? arrrrghh.

Really? Am i that creepy or that unlikable? I know I don't have a picture in my profile. For all anyone knows I probably look creepy or something. Really I'm actually not. Not that that should matter. Oh. I'm feeling so childish. Maybe I just need to stop posting for good. Is it something I've said before? What...What is wrong with me? Why am I struggling with this?I'm sure I'm going to regeret saying this later. I hope I can delete this. But. whateveer. this is how I feel right now. Very lonely. Very alone. Very frustrated. Sorry...sorry.

[duende]

Okay. I had a bit of a moment and would like to apologize for that. This is something I'm working on and I'm truly sorry that I shared any of it here. Oops. I'm flawed.

So, yeah. I've been really feeling alone and like everyone just hates me or is completely annoyed by my presence. God I'm getting so sick of living like this. It's getting really old. When will I ever feel fully confident? I guess I'm working on it.

I'm terribly sorry I shared any of this. I struggle with asking for what I want and hate what happens as a result. I end up falling through the cracks in things. I mean to be more open with everyone. I'm working on this. It's just so hard to separate myself from the negative beliefs that get in my space. I'm a work in progress.

I've been processing a lot of stuff from my life and my breakup 3 months ago. I feel so low sometimes. I know that when I get out of this, I can actually be much better company. But....can I still have a hug? lol

[duende]

Maybe I should play a word game

[TheRealFDeal]

Sorry, duende, if you're feeling ignored. I hate that. Ignored = disrespected. That's my personal equation, but I also realize that my perceptions are flawed. I hate that, too.

[wiltedxdaisy]

Hi duende,

I can relate to this completely, and though I know you say you wish you wouldn't have posted this, I am glad you did, because it's like you took the words right out of my mouth! I have been reaching out both in the "real" world (total failure!) and also online, which I find easier, but still I constantly feel rejected and like I am not good enough. I do not understand what is so wrong with me, why people don't like me. I think this forum has been good for me in that I have made some friends and when I am done posting I am going to send you a friend request (hope that's okay!) because I really think we could be friends and help support each other. I really hope you don't stop posting, as I think that would just make things worse. And btw, I don't have a pic of me on my profile either. Anyway, know you're needing hugs so here are some more from me...

[duende]

So, umm..yeah. Wow.

It was a horrible day yesterday and apparently I totally lost my communication skills and social grace. My bad.

I know we're all here to share and help each other out, but I was way out of line. I kind of want to hide now. Anyway I own up to that. I'm working on taking control of waiting and riding it out when I get these moments. I do need to get better at preventing this kind of thing. But there you go. That was me. And yes, I'm truly sorry.

I am truly thankful we have this place. I'll be better at being open from the get-go and being a better friend, etc. I wish you all a happy day (or evening if you're already there). Okay, peace.

[allme]

Oh I have sooo many of these moments and it's not nice. Sorry you felt that way but glad that you managed to work around these feelings

[thepoetishere]

Duende, you are very likable! Things have been crazy around here since the electrical fire and losing almost all our appliances,,,no heat even. Then, the problems in my head don't .help much. Don't feel bad. We're all going thru it too. Don't stop posting dude. You pretty cool cuz your interested in how others are doing, including me.

[technigal]

Originally Posted by duende

It was a horrible day yesterday and apparently I totally lost my communication skills and social grace. My bad.

Sorry you were having a bad day. We all lose it at times, venting is allowed. Actually, I think this is a pretty good place to vent all sorts of issues.

[Fuzzybear]