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Old Nov 21, 2013, 10:34 AM
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wiltedxdaisy wiltedxdaisy is offline
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Do you ever feel discouraged about your dreams and/or passions? I have this huge passion/dream to help people with Mental Illnesses, but my BPD makes me feel like there is no way I can pursue this. I hate that it holds me back by filling my mind with doubts about what I can accomplish and making me feel like I am not good enough to do something like this and that I will not be able to reach anyone or make a difference.
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  #2  
Old Nov 21, 2013, 11:22 AM
bataviabard bataviabard is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wiltedxdaisy View Post
Do you ever feel discouraged about your dreams and/or passions? I have this huge passion/dream to help people with Mental Illnesses, but my BPD makes me feel like there is no way I can pursue this. I hate that it holds me back by filling my mind with doubts about what I can accomplish and making me feel like I am not good enough to do something like this and that I will not be able to reach anyone or make a difference.
You help many by sharing your story... we don't always know how helpful we are... sometimes it can be just giving a smile to a disgruntled cashier that brightens their day...and that makes a difference
Thanks for this!
hawaii04, wiltedxdaisy
  #3  
Old Nov 21, 2013, 04:39 PM
Anonymous12111009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wiltedxdaisy View Post
Do you ever feel discouraged about your dreams and/or passions? I have this huge passion/dream to help people with Mental Illnesses, but my BPD makes me feel like there is no way I can pursue this. I hate that it holds me back by filling my mind with doubts about what I can accomplish and making me feel like I am not good enough to do something like this and that I will not be able to reach anyone or make a difference.
A lot of people, if not most, question their ability to achieve their dreams. Questioning whether or not you're capable of doing something is pretty natural. Being BPD in no way should hinder your ability to help people at all. It's just a disorder, it does not have to be an obstacle. Although some challenges from it will make it difficult at times, it's up to you to fight through those challenges and pursue your dream.

It only holds you back if you let it.
Thanks for this!
wiltedxdaisy
  #4  
Old Nov 21, 2013, 08:38 PM
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Angel of Bedlam Angel of Bedlam is offline
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Oh this happens to me ALL THE TIME. I swing from feeling like I can do anything to then feeling worthless and l feel like I'll never do anything. You're definitely not alone.

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Am I the only one I know, waging my wars behind my face and above my throat?


Diagnosed:
BPD

PTSD
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wiltedxdaisy
Thanks for this!
wiltedxdaisy
  #5  
Old Nov 21, 2013, 09:44 PM
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1776 1776 is offline
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I had dreams and passions until 2008 when I entered psychosis. I then saw reality and such is the world that I no longer have waking dreams for my life and my passion for everything is dead.

It is a strange feeling to realize I am nobody in this world, that my education and efforts have been in vain and that I will die unknown. I'm of average intelligence and that was a hard pill to swallow but I got past it.

I hope you all take it better than I am.
  #6  
Old Nov 21, 2013, 10:51 PM
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Maranara Maranara is offline
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I have doubt all the time, but we can't allow our hopes and dreams to die. Sometimes it's all we have. We may get knocked around and left for dead on occasion, but we can do this. We have to.
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  #7  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 09:20 AM
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Side of the Angels Side of the Angels is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wiltedxdaisy View Post
Do you ever feel discouraged about your dreams and/or passions? I have this huge passion/dream to help people with Mental Illnesses, but my BPD makes me feel like there is no way I can pursue this. I hate that it holds me back by filling my mind with doubts about what I can accomplish and making me feel like I am not good enough to do something like this and that I will not be able to reach anyone or make a difference.
Like ERRY.DAY.YO

I tell myself I have failed so many times in the past and no matter how much I want something today, it will always be the same. Always feel like a failure. I enrolled in college again this week. And I aim to stay no matter what. One or two classes at a time. I cannot give up, I can't, it makes my depressions so debilitating I can't breathe. I needed support of loving ppl in my life to lift me up again. And a spark, a moment where I knew could do it if I did my BEST. And so can you, one little moment at a time. We aren't going to do our best every second, there will be times of distress and doubt, but if we can keep trudging a tiny moment at a time, we can make big things happen. Best of luck to you.
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  #8  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 09:48 AM
Anonymous100108
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you HAVE dreams??
  #9  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:05 AM
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Angel of Bedlam Angel of Bedlam is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Useless Me View Post
you HAVE dreams??


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Am I the only one I know, waging my wars behind my face and above my throat?


Diagnosed:
BPD

PTSD
  #10  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:07 AM
Anonymous100108
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Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam View Post
Sorry - I just guess I no longer believe in dreams or goals or anything good in this world.
  #11  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:08 AM
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Angel of Bedlam Angel of Bedlam is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Useless Me View Post
Sorry - I just guess I no longer believe in dreams or goals or anything good in this world.
Don't apologize for how you feel! I just hurt for you. I hope you find hope again.

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Am I the only one I know, waging my wars behind my face and above my throat?


Diagnosed:
BPD

PTSD
  #12  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:19 AM
Anonymous100108
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thanks.... but do not waste your time on me.... there are a lot of other good people on here that could be helped.
  #13  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:44 AM
Anonymous12111009
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Everyone has a modicum of dreams and hopes, even if it's just to be able to get out of bed, make it to work and have a decent day, I think that's what helps us all to actually keep going. It's being able to acknowledge and focus on the smaller things in life and build from there. I mean depending on where you're at in your phase of life, if all you do is focus on the big dreams, that may actually feel near impossible at the time, you will constantly feel defeated. Baby steps is what it takes to get to a place where bigger and better dreams are possible.

I tend to not use the term dreams though. I don't use the term because it seems to imply to most everyone and myself that it's something like the "unicorn" in life, a thing that you wish for but internally don't really believe it can happen. But that's just what I think. Don't get me wrong, I also don't use the term "goals" because it always has a negative aspect to it also for me. I try to see it as aspirations, things that I aspire to, as it doesn't imply that it's something I HAVE TO do (goals) nor is it something that is impossible to reach (dreams). It's something I work toward everyday, and it's more of a motivation in the direction of it. I hope this makes sense.

Some of the things I have that keep me going I'll list and I hope it helps.

I aspire to:

Be a better dad (something I can break down and won't always succeed in but is always worked toward)

Be more punctual (I can be a bit tardy to work, typically and it's something I'm working on)

Be financially fit and secure (yeah I could say I'm a failure but I am working on it)

Just few things. Also you haven't missed your boat until you're gone. It's never too late to start small and work toward your aspirations.
  #14  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 03:31 PM
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technigal technigal is offline
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I can remember when I was doing my degree. It was hard, my sister died, I started failing classes, it just seemed like everything was going wrong. I stuck it out and am damn proud of that "piece of paper" (my dad's words). One of my professors wrote me a letter (which I still have a copy of) and in it he said that he knows of no one else that went through as much as I did and still never gave up. I sometimes did things the hard way, bulldozing my way through but I kept going. There were times that I thought I would never finish. I finally gave in and have my degree in Sociology (which I had enough credits for) instead of mathematics which was my dream. I am the only one of my siblings that has a degree, but at times I still feel like I shouldn't have given in and I finished my degree 17 years ago.

Now my dreams are that my husband and son are happy and healthy and that I regain some of my normalcy (this fuzzy brain is driving me crazy).
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Mags

Depression diagnosed March 1996
PTSD diagnosed January 2000
BPD diagnosed September 2013
  #15  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 03:45 PM
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hawaii04 hawaii04 is offline
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I think my dreams and goals are a thing of the past. That so saddens me, but right now I simply don't know how to even have any. My loving, bubbly self is back there somewhere and part of my problem (especially the anger part) is not feeling . . . . like ME anymore. Feeling ugly and angry and unmotivated, ug! Dream? I guess I have to want to first and I'm not even sure how to do that. I would give anything to have that "I can do anything feeling" back in my life if only for a day.
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  #16  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 04:22 PM
Anonymous12111009
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Originally Posted by hawaii04 View Post
I think my dreams and goals are a thing of the past. That so saddens me, but right now I simply don't know how to even have any. My loving, bubbly self is back there somewhere and part of my problem (especially the anger part) is not feeling . . . . like ME anymore. Feeling ugly and angry and unmotivated, ug! Dream? I guess I have to want to first and I'm not even sure how to do that. I would give anything to have that "I can do anything feeling" back in my life if only for a day.
If you equate having dreams as feeling like you can do anything, you'll never feel good enough to have hope again!

Striving for something better and moving toward them does not mean you blindly move forward thinking you are unstoppable or that you "can't fail" at all it means that you decide that as many times as you miss the mark you'll get back to it and keep striving. it means as many times as life knocks you on your butt you'll dust off your britches and start walking again. You just have to find the inspiration to do so.

I refuse to let life keep me down. It's not easy to do but it is, in the end a matter of choice. To life, the devil, to challenges and difficulties, I say try me... I will, get up again.
Thanks for this!
Angel of Bedlam, hawaii04
  #17  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 04:43 PM
BCBPD BCBPD is offline
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Location: Vancouver
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wiltedxdaisy View Post
Do you ever feel discouraged about your dreams and/or passions? I have this huge passion/dream to help people with Mental Illnesses, but my BPD makes me feel like there is no way I can pursue this. I hate that it holds me back by filling my mind with doubts about what I can accomplish and making me feel like I am not good enough to do something like this and that I will not be able to reach anyone or make a difference.
Nope - no dreams or real passions to think about it. Very sad today
  #18  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 05:30 PM
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atomicc atomicc is offline
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Location: NYC
Posts: 2,368
Hmmm, no I don't ever feel discouraged. I do very well and have been told I'll make a great mental health counselor. I don't think my bpd holds me back, but I am a nerd!
__________________
Allie
Diagnosed: Generalized Anxiety Disorder & Obsessive Compulsive Disoder. Previous: Borderline Personality Disorder.

I no longer qualify for a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder, but there will always be my borderline traits that I struggle with especially during times of great stress.


I've been working passionately as a therapist since December 2016
Thanks for this!
Truth in Ruin
  #19  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 08:53 PM
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Angel of Bedlam Angel of Bedlam is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: Lincoln, NE
Posts: 962
Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
Everyone has a modicum of dreams and hopes, even if it's just to be able to get out of bed, make it to work and have a decent day, I think that's what helps us all to actually keep going. It's being able to acknowledge and focus on the smaller things in life and build from there. I mean depending on where you're at in your phase of life, if all you do is focus on the big dreams, that may actually feel near impossible at the time, you will constantly feel defeated. Baby steps is what it takes to get to a place where bigger and better dreams are possible.

I tend to not use the term dreams though. I don't use the term because it seems to imply to most everyone and myself that it's something like the "unicorn" in life, a thing that you wish for but internally don't really believe it can happen. But that's just what I think. Don't get me wrong, I also don't use the term "goals" because it always has a negative aspect to it also for me. I try to see it as aspirations, things that I aspire to, as it doesn't imply that it's something I HAVE TO do (goals) nor is it something that is impossible to reach (dreams). It's something I work toward everyday, and it's more of a motivation in the direction of it. I hope this makes sense.

Some of the things I have that keep me going I'll list and I hope it helps.

I aspire to:

Be a better dad (something I can break down and won't always succeed in but is always worked toward)

Be more punctual (I can be a bit tardy to work, typically and it's something I'm working on)

Be financially fit and secure (yeah I could say I'm a failure but I am working on it)

Just few things. Also you haven't missed your boat until you're gone. It's never too late to start small and work toward your aspirations.
Aspirations... I really like that.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk
__________________


Am I the only one I know, waging my wars behind my face and above my throat?


Diagnosed:
BPD

PTSD
  #20  
Old Nov 22, 2013, 10:17 PM
the abyss the abyss is offline
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Location: australia
Posts: 149
never give up on your dreams , yes make them realistic but strive for what you want in life, if you want to work with the mentally ill, good on you, go for it.
take care
  #21  
Old Nov 23, 2013, 12:31 AM
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Aventurine Aventurine is offline
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Location: Australia
Posts: 129
Think of your dreams (or goals) as the coastline and you're out at sea caught in a swell. Sometimes in rough weather we only catch glimpses of it or we cant see it at all, but it is still there..

Geez, my ambitions change all the time, I am 36 ,single (double divorcee), studying for my first BA in Social Science, I want to travel and experience as many culture and I can and I want to be a social worker, yet I am a self confessed hermit and misanthrope... Hmm go figure?

My one dream is to become a writer, but I have other goals and interests I will pursue in the meantime, but one thing is for sure, I am gaining a world or experience with all this chopping and changing!!
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