[technigal]

I know there are several parents on here. My son is 8 and has Aspergers (or whatever they want to call it these days), he questions everything and is reading at a high school level. How do you tell them that your brain is effed up. I am not even going to go into my childhood, he does not need to know the crap I went through. He is a very intelligent kid and is going to remember whatever I tell him.

So far we have told him that mommy's brain does not work normally and that we are trying to find ways so that I am not angry all the time. He knows that I took too much medicine (not to what extent or that it was on purpose), he was here when the ambulance came.

How do you answer the questions???

[spondiferous]

From where I stand it sounds like you're handling it pretty well. I mean, the truth is, you're right about what to expose your kid to: regardless of whether or not a child has Asperger's, I think we could all stand to be a little more sensitive to what we tell our kids. I think that any information should definitely be age-appropriate (even if he is smart for his age; there is a difference between intelligence and emotional maturity). It sounds like that's what you're doing. Sorry I can't be of more help...

[Maranara]

I wrote something a long time ago about this. I have since left and come back, but I'll see if I can find it.

[winter4me]

It does sound like you are handling it well. Answer questions honestly, but at an age-appropriate level and no more than what is asked. Explain simply but clearly when something happens what is going on. ...sounds like that is what you are doing.

[cboxpalace]

The K*I*S*S system works best.. Keep it simple stupid. I went through this conversation with my kids. I don't think it's appropriate to go through every specific detail. I explained to my kids that I had a traumatic childhood that affects me today, and because of that I have major depression which affects my ability to work. I also explained that I wanted them to grow up, be happy, and not experience what I do as an adult. I think that is sufficient. They don't need to know every detail at this age. I asked if they had any question or thought of me different and they didn't nor did it change their opinion of me.

Studies show that it's best to tell children rather than to keep them in the dark, and by keeping them in the dark it can cause resentment later in life.

So my main advice is keep it simple.

[allme]

I'm not a parent but I was a child of a parent with severe mental issues. My parents never sat me down and explained that or why my mother was mentally ill. I grew up copying her behaviour and often felt pressure to make her feel better. I wish they had sat me down and explained some of it to me. Now we talk about it but I wish I had an understanding while growing up. But then saying that, I may have felt even more pressure to be better for her and make her feel better....I dunno.

Good luck and I hope it helps your children