[dancinglady]

I keep looking on this site for true cured BPDs. Do they exist where a person is totally cured. Never has to think about this ever again and reaches total "normal" living. Lives life not having to use or think of DBT skills? Just wondering cuz I never hear of anyone getting a normal life. No more therapy no more meds no more DBT classes.

I think that if someone is considered 'cured' they probably wouldn't be here. After all one only comes to a support site because they need support.

So I don't think the people here are anything to judge healing by.

Having said that I remember seeing a couple who say they no longer qualify for a BPD diagnosis.

[Crazy Hitch]

I'm no medical professional but I was kind of hoping my bpd symptoms might diminish with dbt. I'm not expecting them to go away forever because especially in crisis situations it rares it's ugly head. I don't make friends really. Don't see how DBT can help that. I guess I'm saying im just hoping some symptoms of my BPD might go into "remission"???

[dancinglady]

I was hoping that long termers or Doc John would answer this ??? They would had seem people come on the site and get well and successfully live life free of symptoms. Due to the fact I am 63 and still struggle gives me little hope of ever being cured. I have worked long and hard. If u look at Marsha's current photos you see an old lady with a dog. Is that not a picture of another lonely old lady. She may have occupation ally been above the charts successful but when she retires she will retire with no husband no children no grandchildren. When it will just be Marsha it will be a sad ending unless she does not care. I work with one of her students. Up until recently she was "hitting on" her young students to date her.

[Trippin2.0]

I know that some people progress so much so that they no longer meet the diagnostic criteria, but I myself have no hopes of being cured of my personality... However disordered it may be.


The best I hope for is that my coping mechanisms become second nature (some already have) and thus bring my chaos down to a manageable minimum...


If you want replies from people like Doc John, I suggest you PM a specific member or post in Clyde's corner as they don't read through each forum, this place is way too huge to leave something like that up to chance.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I was hoping that long termers or Doc John would answer this ??? They would had seem people come on the site and get well and successfully live life free of symptoms. Due to the fact I am 63 and still struggle gives me little hope of ever being cured. I have worked long and hard. If u look at Marsha's current photos you see an old lady with a dog. Is that not a picture of another lonely old lady. She may have occupation ally been above the charts successful but when she retires she will retire with no husband no children no grandchildren. When it will just be Marsha it will be a sad ending unless she does not care. I work with one of her students. Up until recently she was "hitting on" her young students to date her.

I'm 56 and I don't ever expect any "cures" anymore either. To me, my life will have been enormously successful just for getting through it.

ETA: it doesn't matter if you crawl to the finish line, you still get there.

[dancinglady]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

I'm 56 and I don't ever expect any "cures" anymore either. To me, my life will have been enormously successful just for getting through it.

ETA: it doesn't matter if you crawl to the finish line, you still get there.

Looks like I got my answer no one ever gets cured.

[ifst5]

There is no cure. Some claim to be cleared of enough symptoms to no longer fit the criteria but I've not met many and I'm sure that it probably took them both a lot of work to arrive there and maintain such a position.

I'm always a bit confused as to why the focus is on a cure - if we concentrate on the symptoms that are actually bothering us (and they're not the same for everyone) why would even need to think about being 'normal.' It's like a contradiction in terms...

[dancinglady]

[QUOTE=Angelique67;4051006]I'm 56 and I don't ever expect any "cures" anymore either. To me, my life will have been enormously successful just for getting through it.

ETA: it doesn't matter if you crawl to the finish line, you still get there.[/QWEB

Spoken like a true mental health patient. Crawling like a child is so characteristic of a MH patient. again y I do not wish to live that life. I like the fast and successful life ways that normal people live in.

[dancinglady]

Originally Posted by ifst5

There is no cure. Some claim to be cleared of enough symptoms to no longer fit the criteria but I've not met many and I'm sure that it probably took them both a lot of work to arrive there and maintain such a position.

I'm always a bit confused as to why the focus is on a cure - if we concentrate on the symptoms that are actually bothering us (and they're not the same for everyone) why would even need to think about being 'normal.' It's like a contradiction in terms...

Normal is where the world is. People who live in nice houses have jobs have the nicer people and things in their life. Look around at your docs do you think they would trade their lives for ours. Not for a minute. What do you think the skills teach us - how to fit in the Normal world DAH.

[Angelique67]

[QUOTE=dancinglady;4051488]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

I'm 56 and I don't ever expect any "cures" anymore either. To me, my life will have been enormously successful just for getting through it.

ETA: it doesn't matter if you crawl to the finish line, you still get there.[/QWEB

Spoken like a true mental health patient. Crawling like a child is so characteristic of a MH patient. again y I do not wish to live that life. I like the fast and successful life ways that normal people live in.

So be it if I crawl. I gave up wanting a normal life a long time ago. But I wish you good luck.

[dancinglady]

[QUOTE=Angelique67;4051534]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

So be it if I crawl. I gave up wanting a normal life a long time ago. But I wish you good luck.

Why??????????? Don't u think u r worth it?

[ifst5]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

Normal is where the world is. People who live in nice houses have jobs have the nicer people and things in their life. Look around at your docs do you think they would trade their lives for ours. Not for a minute. What do you think the skills teach us - how to fit in the Normal world DAH.

I don't appreciate warped perception wrapped up in rudeness. 1 in 4 people can succumb to ill mental health at any time in a given year - so it doesn't matter whether you're a doctor or a businessman or have a nice kitchen, you're not immune to an imperfect body. They've simply been luckier for longer and their fortunes can reverse at any given moment.

To expect a cure for something which can only be made better through hard work is pure fantasy. To work hard towards a goal whilst expecting limitations and setbacks - is as close to the so called 'normal' you're describing.

Please take care here - we're sensitive souls who have been through immense amounts of pain; we're happy to share with you the information and advice we've received ourselves but the internet still observes common courtesy and kindness. None more so then here.

[Angelique67]

[QUOTE=dancinglady;4051580]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Why??????????? Don't u think u r worth it?

Worth has nothing to do with it. What I can do, I do my best to do. If it doesn't bring me a normal life those are the breaks for me. I'm OK with that. Not saying you or anyone else should be if that's not good enough for you. I guess I still have enough of a philosophical and spiritual bent that life boils down to more than normalcy and material happiness to me.

[jean17]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I keep looking on this site for true cured BPDs. Do they exist where a person is totally cured. Never has to think about this ever again and reaches total "normal" living. Lives life not having to use or think of DBT skills? Just wondering cuz I never hear of anyone getting a normal life. No more therapy no more meds no more DBT classes.

Dear Dancinglady, the answer is "no". We are never cured. The skills that we learn in DBT can become automatic so that we don't have to think about them and then actively engage them, but we will never stop needing them.
The best that I can see for myself is that when I still have these deep and dangerous moods I will be able to remind myself that they always pass. I will try not to act on my extreme moods (Emotion Regulation) and I will try to accept myself without judgment (Mindfulness). I will try to always treat myself very gently.
It is also good to know that we can jump in and re-take any of the modules if we want to. (At least we can with my Mental Health group).
Meds? I've been stable on mine for over a year and my Psychiatrist sees no reason to tamper with the regimen that we have finally found that helps me. I expect that I will always be medicated.
Don't feel bad about this. It's no different from treating yourself your whole life for any other disease. Try to be grateful/thankful for all the help that we can get.