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#1
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I was just thinking....
A relative has anger issues and my mom is always saying "they need to get that boy help". She worries herself to death about him and always says things like "You can tell when someone needs help and that kid definitely does. They should be able to read their kid better." If it's always so apparent, why could they never see how bad I'm hurting? Or anyone else for that matter. I know I'm not alone thinking this, but doesn't it feel terrible to not be validated or understood just because there's no visible "boo-boo" to be bandaged up? It's such a lonely place. When you're visibly angry, people see something. But it makes you feel like your problems aren't real if no one else can see them. Some people act out, a lot of others act in. You grow up just getting told to "snap out of it" when you seem depressed, because you're "just having a bad day". "People only get depressed when someone dies or goes through a divorce. Then they get over it." Your inability to interact with others is just because you're a little "shy" and need to talk to people more. Your anxiety is just your natural nervous "personality". Your OCD symptoms are just "nervous habits". Your inability to focus prevents you from driving, but you won't get behind the wheel because you're "scared". No one could fathom the hollow, empty, numb, nothingness that resides in your body. Your non-existent sense of self is just "growing up and not knowing what you want to be"....ever. You're just "immature" thinking you want to be a doctor one day, beautician another, singer, journalist, teacher, veterinarian, until you eventually have no career. As if all these "affirmations" make your problems go away, and you're healed. You're all alone. You're alone because you can't let people in. You can't let them in mostly because they don't understand. They don't understand because they're not you. So you just keep everything bottled up and continue acting in until it eats away at you. Keep your head up, drama queen. They're all right. You're perfectly fine. |
![]() Anonymous200104
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#2
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A lot of people just don't get it, and they're afraid to try. Or they don't have the intellectual means to do so. My family is somewhat similar (although they don't really tell me to snap out of it or anything). My mother and uncle are bipolar, I have severe depression and BPD. When I try to explain BPD to my other family members in simple terms and tell them what I need from them, their eyes basically glaze over; they aren't listening.
My aunt once asked me, "Isn't there some kind of blood test they can do to find out what brain chemicals are out of whack and fix them??" This is a woman who obtained BS in Dietetics in the 80's. Sure, she didn't major in psychology or neuroscience but still... Tl;dr: People don't get it. Sometimes they just don't have the capacity to do so. It isn't you, it's them and even though it hurts you have to ignore their lack of support. |
![]() purplek0ala
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![]() purplek0ala
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