[Ruby R]

Hello.
While I was writing the title, it made me think of standing in the school playground, looking in on a group of children playing happily. I've always felt like I didn't really 'get' the rules of life/ the game and struggled with things that other people seemed to find easy. I find it so hard to manage my emotions and to be around people. I would go from being outwardly mild to raging and causing a lot of pain.
A year ago, I was worn out with it all and knew I couldn't carry on. I have two daughters and a husband and they were caught up in all this. I asked for help as loudly as I could and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression.
I knew this wasn't the whole story and read about BPD. I was amazed. They were describing me.
This was a pivotal moment, as up until that point I thought it was just me who had these issues and had always felt alone. Reading about BPD, seeing myself described in a non-judgemental way,defining the problems, was the first step.
I am working with a therapist using DBT and have been writing in a group which has been very helpful. I would love to have the chance to talk to other people who are living with BPD. I know the amount of strength it takes to go out into the world every day and I know how intense the pain is, when it's at its worst. I don't know if that helps? I would love to hear your stories and I thank you for sharing and reaching out the hand of friendship. It helps.

[LittleEarthquakes]

Thanks for sharing and welcome to PC. I relate to the first part of your post very much. I've always been emotionally volatile and never felt like I belonged anywhere. In some ways I'm more isolated now than I ever have been. But as a child I never really talked about how I'm feeling, so at least now I have a couple of people who know.