[Nicky123]

Did any of you abuse alcohol and if so how did your behavior change? I used alcohol I suppose to self medicate. I never drank to get completely smashed but I always did. I would become very aggressive and was arrested on several occasions over the years. I was a binge drinker and would go months/years without any alcohol but would always return to it at some point. (It's 6 years this month since my last drink). AA never helped, though I could relate to what many said, I could not stay sober. (I stopped attending AA and got sober, it's not for everyone). I had, what others describe, as a complete change of personality when I drank. I also used prescription drugs as often as I could get them.
I only ever self harmed when I was drunk and don't really understand this as I never felt the need when sober. Can anyone relate? My drinking destroyed my life in every area and if I had my life over I would have never picked it up. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Thanks in advance....

[CopperStar]

I've gone through periods of self-medicating with alcohol, for my bipolar / BPD/PTSD issues combo. Mostly straight hard liquors, vodka has always been a favorite of mine. I'd stop by the gas station and get one of those little $4 bottles like the plastic Smirnoff ones, maybe splurge on a pricier small bottle of Absolut.

For me it was because my experience was that it allowed me to feel without it being overwhelming. It would be cathartic and 'deep' but not make me feel crazy. During mixed states I would also try to use it to help me sleep, sometimes would work but more often than not I'd go through the whole process of drunk --> sober --> hungover, and still be awake.

Too much over too many days and it would exacerbate my depression symptoms and suicidal ideation.

[Crazy Hitch]

At University - sure, a hell of alot.

The main reason why I don't drink as much now is because the meds I'm on for Bipolar - alcohol completely knocks me out, and very quickly, so that within an hour I simply want to pass out and fall fast asleep. So if I'm out with friends ... well, that's no good.