[BadWolfC]

I'm curious as to what insights some of you may have on this.

The only condition I have been formally diagnosed with is Bipolar, but I have never seemed to fit into a particular type and I've felt for a long time that there is something else going on with me that is being overlooked. Before being diagnosed with Bipolar, I was "severely depressed" for years. However, in reading about Borderline Personality Disorder, I feel like it describes me perfectly.

I was never consistently depressed, it usually varied between depression and hatred for myself and others when I was going through one of the depressive phases. Sometimes I'm very sociable, other times I can't stand people in the slightest and I can't even go outside because I don't want to deal with them. The older I get the more reclusive I become, but there are a few select people I can deal with. My fiance is the only person who doesn't drive me crazy, even though I see him every day. I don't know what makes him different, maybe it's because he's so quiet and relaxed.

I tend to go through phases with people where I need to be around them every day, then I can't stand them. The people I've been in relationships with in the past I had to see all the time, I just couldn't handle being away from them, and those relationships were rocky at best. Again, my fiance is the exception. No idea why.

I'm also reckless, I act before I think when I am upset or angry. I am presently going through an identity crisis regarding my career (I hate my field but I don't know what else I could do) and yesterday I dyed my hair without thinking it through because I wanted to have some kind of control over my life. This is the first issue like this I've had in months though, so at least there's that.

None of the medications that are normally prescribed for Bipolar have worked on me, in fact most have made me sick. The only thing that helps me at all is Abilify, and I have yet to figure out why that is.

Anyway, I'll end my novel of a post at that. If you have any thoughts or suggestions, feel free to comment. Thanks for reading.

[Blue_Bird]

It's possible to have both, it's also possible you were misdiagnosed but only a doctor could tell you that. The best advice I can give is for you to tell your doctor everything you've said here, why you think it fits you more. It may take time but eventually they will come to a conclusion. Some meds help the symptoms of borderline but not all of the disorder. There is DBT which is a form of therapy that is specifically designed for those with BPD.

[BadWolfC]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

It's possible to have both, it's also possible you were misdiagnosed but only a doctor could tell you that. The best advice I can give is for you to tell your doctor everything you've said here, why you think it fits you more. It may take time but eventually they will come to a conclusion. Some meds help the symptoms of borderline but not all of the disorder. There is DBT which is a form of therapy that is specifically designed for those with BPD.

I'm going to look into it with a doctor once I'm able to. For some reason the mental health care where I live is severely limited, and the doctor I'm seeing now is the only good one for like 50 miles, so his schedule is insane. I don't even think I'd be able to get into therapy here, but I'm going to look into it anyway.

[comethisfar]

BadWolfC, I agree with BlueBird. If you suspect it is BPD looking up a therapist or local support at NEA BPD might also be an option. All the best!

[Chuva]

I was misdiagnosed with Bipolar for 10 years before finding out I have BPD instead. It's vital you seek another opinion if you are not convinced Bipolar is your right diagnosis. I would recommend seeing someone who is experienced in treating and diagnosing BPD - that's what I did.

Oh, and by the way, Abilify is working wonders for me too. When I was in the hospital my pdoc of the time told me "she had never seen anything like that" (in terms of a response to the med).