[Maranara]

I'm writing this to help a few people. I'll never, ever say I'm "cured" from BPD or the laundry list of other things I have or might possibly have, but I've learned to deal with it 95% of the time, and I'd like to share how.

1. Stick away, as much as you can, from things that trigger you. To me, that list includes PC. I'm very empathetic, and after a while I start "feeling" other people's issues and let them become mine. That's something I can't afford to do. Therefore, after this entry, I probably won't be back for a while. It's not that I don't want to; it's something I have to do for my HEALTH.

2. Practice mindfulness and meditation. The only time we really own is NOW. Believe it or not, people are meant to be happy. When someone says something that's going to cause a tirade, crying fit, etc.....breathe. I know that sounds silly, but try it. Close your eyes and focus entirely on your breathing for ten seconds or so. If you start thinking of stuff, go back to your breathing. I can PROMISE that you'll feel better when you're done. No....it's not going to go away, but you may be able to deal a little better for a bit.

3. Most BPDs also have PTSD. Someone disses us and we can't let it go. It makes us think of the crap we grew up with....that we can't do anything right, that no one will never love us, that we deserve to be abused, neglected etc. I am formally here to say that is bulls**t. That is the attitude we need to gain with those people. They shouldn't mean crap to us. It is hard, but love yourself, or at least respect yourself to genuinely say "I'm better than this" or "I don't deserve this". I send the middle finger behind their backs.

4. Everyday, be grateful for what you do have. Everyday, before I go to bed, I go through things that were "good" that happened that day. Someone smiles at you in the store, you had enough money to pay rent, you had the silence you needed....whatever. It's small stuff, but it can make a gigantic difference to acknowledge what little stuff you have. Believe me....not everything happens is bad. Give everything that does happen some credit...it's not all bad even though it seems that way sometimes.

5. Ask for what you need. You don't have to believe in God to do this...just throw it to the wind. "I need more patience", "I need to have $________ by the end of the month......whatever. That doesn't mean you can stop working for it, but stating it outright makes puts it firmly in your own head and turns the power to something other than yourself. Once you say it, work like h*ll to get it.

6. If a doctor suggests meds and you've tried as hard as you can to say "no" but the problems won't go away, take them. I fought for over two years before I sought them out. I just didn't have the choice, and it helped....not so much with the BPD as some sleeping disorders I have, but still. It is not weakness. You just need help for a little while to get over the hump. I get that. Try them, and if they help, great, and plan on when you can get off of them.

I hope this helped a few people. Keep the faith....you'll get better, but you are the only one who can REALLY make that happen.Take back your life.....today.

[Maranara]

Oh....and one thing I almost forgot. Get plenty of sleep every night. I make certain I'm in bed between 10 and 11. I'm sure you've noticed: lack of sleep can cause disorientation and for all of those emotions to be on edge much more than otherwise. I'm sometimes taken aback by going to bed relatively early; my family includes a lot of night owls and I feel like I'm being left out, but I know I'll feel better the next day because of it, so despite the BPD feelings creeping to the surface, it's worth it.

[Fuzzybear]

[DBTDiva]

Originally Posted by Maranara

Oh....and one thing I almost forgot. Get plenty of sleep every night. I make certain I'm in bed between 10 and 11. I'm sure you've noticed: lack of sleep can cause disorientation and for all of those emotions to be on edge much more than otherwise. I'm sometimes taken aback by going to bed relatively early; my family includes a lot of night owls and I feel like I'm being left out, but I know I'll feel better the next day because of it, so despite the BPD feelings creeping to the surface, it's worth it.

Agreed 100% on all points.

[Unrigged64072835]

Excellent!

[shezbut]

Such a nice treat to see you in here again, Maranara! Even though it's a very brief visit, your helpful tips will stay for a long time. Best wishes and lots of love sent your way. Take care!