[jeremiahgirl]

I'm curious, there are many with various ailments in the mental health field. My question is above Do you resent your diagnosis what ever it is? And if so how do manage those feelings?

Personally, I struggle with this question. Though given a dx of BPD, I question if all symptoms will eventually be gone, or will I struggle the rest of my life with this.



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[Skeezyks]

Hello jeremiahgirl: Well... the Skeezyks has never received a formal diagnosis. I suppose there must be something written down somewhere for insurance purposes, if nothing else. So I guess I can't really resent something I don't actually have. I do frequently resent all of the terrible things I've done over the years, which I presume (hope?) were the result of having been struggling with mental health issues. How I manage those feelings is to simply strive to accept them... with compassion.

I once read the book Lost in the Mirror which, of course, is about BPD. In reading that book, I thought that there was a distinct possibility I could have been diagnosed with it when I was young. This would, however, no longer be the case. I was told, by my last therapist, that BPD tends to burn itself out as one ages. So I speculate that perhaps this may have been what happened with me.

In my case, I think what replaced my BPD (if in fact I ever had it) was depression & anxiety. So, if you take my case as instructive... no you won't struggle with BPD symptoms all of your life. But they may simply be replaced by symptoms related to depression & anxiety. Of course, I don't know... I'm just speculating. But I think the important thing is to do whatever you can to heal from your BPD so that you don't continue to struggle as you get older.

[jeremiahgirl]

I'm almost the golden age of 60, and was dx almost 5 years ago.
I get moments of intense emotions which are sometimes hard to process; its in those moments when I want to punch, or hit. So far that hasn't changed. I asked a therapist one time if BPD ever goes away they stated no, one has to learn to manage their emotions; which I believe one can manage it's just a question of how long. I struggle with anxiety occasionally, no depression. In the past yes but no longer.
Thanks!

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[Unrigged64072835]

I guess the BPD has been the hardest to accept and the easiest to resent, because of the stigma attached to it. It's as if now, if I go to the ER, I have to explain that my reason is part of my bipolar disorder and not BPD. Otherwise I get sent home and told to get help elsewhere. (This has actually happened to me.) If I have a BPD flareup, I'm told to figure out what my triggers are and deal with them. I find, at least where I live, that people with BPD are treated differently than the rest of the mentally ill. It sucks, but I've learned to live with it.

[jeremiahgirl]

I think it's due to the suicidal aspects of mental illness with the BPD that has everyone alarmed. Are you aware of your triggers (what they are?) and how do you mange them? I was just chatting about what causes triggers for me it often happens when I'm stressed: I feel overwhelmed and wanna hit something. I guess the anxiety is a big clue for me.

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[Pastel Kitten]

When I was first diagnosed with BPD, I was scared that I would never recover. No, the illness itself never goes away, but it certainly can be lived with. I accept that I'm borderline, but am very aware that I'm not the embodiment of my illness, just like a person with a broken arm is not their broken arm itself. I'm determined to "make amends" with my inner enemy, and come to some sort of compromise. I remind myself that while BPD is an awful affliction, being able to experience emotions on a higher level also means experiencing joy on a higher level as well, when joy is present.

[leomama]

I also don't have a PD dx anymore however today when I was trying to explain bp to my d15 she thought I was talked about BPD so I had to say "no honey, that's what I have, rapid mood swings, bp mood swings last longer". That was kind of funny. She's definitely seen me go through some emotions .

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