[HD7970GHZ]

Hello all,

Occasionally I get the urge to buy things. Usually it is when I am alone and feel the need to fill my life with something... I am very self-aware but that urge become so very strong and is so hard to resist!

Yesterday I had the urge to upgrade my computer. I stayed mindful and eventually succumbed and went out to buy something less expensive than the part that I wanted. I justified the purchase because it was on sale... I brought it home, tested it, felt good about the purchase. Then within a few hours, buyers remorse started to eat me apart...

This morning I got up and felt guilt and shame for wasting money. So I spent the next couple hours researching online about the hardware to try and justify the purchase... I could not find anything that made me feel better.

I just went and returned the computer hardware and now I feel better...

Anyone else experience this? Any advice or suggestions about how you deal with this?

Thanks,
HD7970ghz

[shezbut]

I struggle with urges to buy things as well. Thankfully, they're less expensive, but regardless, they add up in the end! It's good that you let yourself feel shameful and explore WHY you felt that way ~ so you could eventually make yourself feel better. I think *that's terrific*!! I really do.

While it would be great if you could avoid the entire event, it is terrific that you were able to turn things around for yourself. Kudos to you!

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by HD7970GHZ

Hello all,

Occasionally I get the urge to buy things. Usually it is when I am alone and feel the need to fill my life with something... I am very self-aware but that urge become so very strong and is so hard to resist!

Yesterday I had the urge to upgrade my computer. I stayed mindful and eventually succumbed and went out to buy something less expensive than the part that I wanted. I justified the purchase because it was on sale... I brought it home, tested it, felt good about the purchase. Then within a few hours, buyers remorse started to eat me apart...

This morning I got up and felt guilt and shame for wasting money. So I spent the next couple hours researching online about the hardware to try and justify the purchase... I could not find anything that made me feel better.

I just went and returned the computer hardware and now I feel better...

Anyone else experience this? Any advice or suggestions about how you deal with this?

Thanks,
HD7970ghz

Yes I completely relate. I always get urges to spend money. I used to waste money on a game on my phone . I could spend over £100 a month on a game that I play. I feel terribly guilty after especially when I am struggling to buy food and pay bills

[Frankbtl]

Hi HD

I'm just making sure that it isn't all unjustified guilt and shame you're feeling first........I mean if it's not impacting your finances, home or life in a truly negative way........then maybe sometimes being "frivolous" doesn't have to be a bad thing.........just that sometimes people can feel bad about getting "unnecessary"/totally "unneeded"/"useless" things when it may not be warranted...........

Otherwise could you maybe have an action plan for when those urges strike including some substitutes for actually going out and buying..........some other ways to give you a similar but different "buzz", achievement, comfort, self affirmation??
Could be something active to get a bit of an endorphin rush or to feel that you've done something for you..........something like swimming, walking, exercising..........
Could be going to somewhere you find relaxing/peaceful like a park.........
Could be reaching out to, or doing something for someone...........
Could be doing something you haven't got around to in a while e.g. reading a book..........

Or maybe instead focus your spending?? For example have a system of saving up for something you really, really want and focusing on that??
As for the spontaneaous urges maybe list some cheaper, and much harder to find items you might like which will fill some of those times??
Or set yourself a budget for spontaneous purchases??

Just some thoughts............

But, real well done on resolving the computer hardware issue



Alison

[Unrigged64072835]

I feel that way with clothes. I buy a lot, then want to take them back. I also feel guilty because I have a bunch of software that I'm not using. Ugh.

[Paisley Cow]

i buy a lot of converse, and for some reason i bought an expensive Mandolin last year, although i can't play any instrument lol

I used to have trouble with buying clothes. Now if i'm looking something over i remind myself that it will just at to the storage crisis and the laundry crisis and i can usually talk myself out of it.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

The same thing happens with me, its a vicious cycle. I feel really distressed, buy something to make myself feel better then get buyers remorse. Its a little better for me now. I used to just impulsively buy things. My biggest weakness was clothes as well. Now I am running out of storage for them so I am picky with what I get. I think what helped me was realizing I was doing this to fill the empty feeling/hole inside of myself that got bigger the more distressed I am. After being mindful of the urge to buy something and describing the feelings behind it, its easier to notice. I still struggle with the urge but I try to do other things to cope in the moment.

[StrawberryFieldsss]

I do this too often. I can stop it sometimes by taking stock in what I already have...writing and lists help me... it helps me to engage more to have to write down the stuff that I already have. If its clothing or something I get in there and organize and clean. Toiletries is another area where I struggle... I will organize that too to make myself more aware of what I actually have. If nothing else it buys me time to come down from the impulse.

[crimsoncat]

Yes clothes too ,doesn't help when the companies keep sending catalogue's to your door 24/7 !!!! .

[graystreet]

I have done this and now I am paying off a credit card because of it, and not the first time either. The good thing is that I make enough to be able to do that. Bad thing is there is so much more I could be doing with my money than paying off things I'm already bored with.