[Albatross2008]

In general, I don't want words. I want changed behavior. But words do matter too. When you were growing up, what would have been helpful for you to hear? These are mine.

--You're good enough the way you are. You don't have to be way above average at everything to make me proud of you.

--It's OK that you're not as good at the chores as I am, or as fast. You're a child. You shouldn't be expected to do what an adult does, since you don't have the strength or the experience.

--You deserved better than I gave you.

--I see your point. I understand what you're trying to say. Sometimes it really is the other person's issue, not yours.

--It's OK to like whatever you like. You don't have to have the same tastes as I do. Just because I don't prefer the same music, or the same colors, or the same clothes, or the same TV shows, doesn't mean you're wrong.

[Spirit_]

"It's going to be alright. How can I help?"

"I'm here for you. Talk to me when your ready."

"I love you all equally"

"Don't listen to them; you're perfect just the way you are."

"It's okay to not want to take medication. Is there any way I can help you feel better?"

These are some of mine. My mom was never there for me as a kid and my dad's a workaholic.

[TheLifeFantastic]

"I'm proud of you"

"Your best is not the same everyday"

"It's okay to show feelings"

"I trust in the work that you do for me"

That is what I wanted to hear from my Dad. Sadly in my life I didn't say those to others due to not knowing any better, but now I know that I will in the future speak them.

[twistypringle98]

"Stop watching TV all the time!" - but seriously we should have been disciplined more because that is a sign that a parent is actually involved in the child's life!

"Yes, I will go to your parent teacher conference"

"This is delicious!" My sis and I did all the cooking in the house for a while after my Mom started working again.

[HowDoYouFeelMeow?]

I love you.
I'm proud of you.
I'm glad you made it home safe from practice. Goodnight.
Have you gotten a chance to eat dinner? Are you hungry?
Do you have lunch money?
Let me know when you arrive safely.
What can I do to help?
I believe you.
I'm sorry.

[malika138]

Thanks everyone for these voices - they are right on target!

[downandlonely]

I wish my mom hadn't told me she never wanted kids. Even if I have an "accidental" child, I will never tell them that.

[Kirabelle]

Originally Posted by downandlonely

I wish my mom hadn't told me she never wanted kids. Even if I have an "accidental" child, I will never tell them that.

My mom has said the same. PLUS..I was a burden to raise because of my rheumatoid arthritis. I could never say this to a child!

Originally Posted by Kirabelle

My mom has said the same. PLUS..I was a burden to raise because of my rheumatoid arthritis. I could never say this to a child!

My father (when I was 15): "my life would have been infinitely better if I had never had children.

My mother (when I was 20): "you are one of my greatest disappointments in life."

[Travelinglady]

So, they should have said to you, "We are happy we had children and that you are one of them." Neither parent said that to me either.

And "we are so proud of you." I didn't get that either.

[Albatross2008]

--The bullies didn't have any right to say that to you. It was mean of them.

(As opposed to they're just being kids, learn to take teasing, quit being so sensitive, what did you do to egg them on, etc.)

[A Hobbit]

“It’s okay to be different. You aren’t hurting anybody. We accept you the way you are. You should too.”

[Albatross2008]

--The skills you're good at are just as important in life as the skills you're not good at. You don't have to give up and stop doing something just because it doesn't come easily, or other people are better at it. Even if you're not good at it now, keep practicing, and you'll improve.

--You are not your behavior. We all do the wrong thing sometimes, and I still love you. Instead of rejecting you, I'll take the time to show you why it was wrong, and what to do next time.

--If I'm going to leave you in charge of your younger siblings, and hold you responsible if they get hurt, I'm also going to tell them to listen to you. It's only fair.

--You're going to make a fine, competent, worthy adult some day who can take care of herself.

[Albatross2008]

--I'm not going to use "looking for a father for my kids" as an excuse to keep marrying the next abusive alcoholic that comes along. Instead, I'm going to work on myself and my own life, so I can attract a man who will actually make a good father.

--We're going to stop moving around and changing schools so much. We're going to stay where we are so you can get a stable, continual education in one spot.

[winter4me]

We love you.

[lotusblossom19]

I accept you for who you are. You are good enough the way you are!

You're not being too sensitive. You have the right to feel hurt if people are mean to you.

Tell me why you feel the way you feel. I'm listening with love.

Instead of telling you to get over it and expecting you to just overcome the problem with no emotional support, let me help you with some compassion to get through it.

[Albatross2008]

--I trust you to make the right choice for yourself, even if it isn't the same choice I would have made.

[Amethyst_Stargazer]

"I understand how you feel and it's okay to feel this way. There's nothing to be ashamed of."

"good night, love"

not difficult

" I love you"

" I'm proud of you"

" let's do something together"

"here, let me treat you"

[jtswift_2000]

I love you.

You're my little man and Mammy will always love you.

Sit you down when you're sad and listen to understand and not to reply.

Show compassion even when you're going through your own strifes.

Remember that children are sponges and while they may not remember what you said at the time, it may and will surface in the future.

Show an interest in your hobbies and not just an interest on why you're getting in trouble and stating how bold you are.