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Grand Member
Member Since Nov 2019
Location: In my head, mostly
Posts: 754
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#1
Do you remember having fantasies about being loved and taken care of growing up? I remember fantasizing about that a lot while lying in bed at night. I guess I must have been around 7 or so. It was never about my parents, always just imaginary people and stories that I made up in my head.
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Bill3, Buffy01, Fuzzybear, MuseumGhost, Open Eyes, unaluna
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Buffy01, MuseumGhost
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
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#2
That is how you practiced self soothing. Nothing wrong with that, it helped you survive.
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MuseumGhost, unaluna
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Bill3, FluffyDinosaur, MuseumGhost
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
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#3
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MuseumGhost, unaluna
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
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#4
I think that that (or similar) helped us to survive
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MuseumGhost, unaluna
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MuseumGhost
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
Posts: 2,439
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#5
My fantasies were all about finding some place to survive on my own. As a six year old I had a fantasy that I would runaway and live at school. There was a little alcove by my classroom where I would sleep at night, and I would wash in the bathrooms during the school day. I would steal lunches during the day so I would have food nd I would pretend to leave at the end of the school day so non-one would know I was living at the school. I found a spot where I thought I could safely keep blankets too.
Another fantasy was building myself a hut out of driftwood and living at a private beach across the farm from our home. There were quite a few holes in my plans. But, I never could even imagine that anybody could ever love or look after me. I just wanted to be away from people so they couldn't hurt me. |
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Fuzzybear, MuseumGhost, unaluna, ziggystarlord144
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MuseumGhost
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New Member
Member Since Jul 2017
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 2
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#6
I had childhood fantasies but they weren't like others have shared.
I would fantasize that I was in a desperate situation that would put me into a state of giving up on life (either physical or emotional). then someone would enter this story that would try to convince me that life was worth living and that I was worth saving. I'm so sorry if this triggers someone. I have had these dark thoughts for so long. I have tried to find a therapist who would stick with me with no success. Not sure where to turn at this point except to maybe open up to folks about what is really going on with me. Thanks for listening. |
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MuseumGhost, unaluna, ziggystarlord144
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MuseumGhost
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New Member
Member Since Nov 2020
Location: United States
Posts: 9
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#7
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Amyjay, MuseumGhost, unaluna
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MuseumGhost
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New Member
Member Since Nov 2020
Location: United States
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#8
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Amyjay, MuseumGhost, unaluna
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MuseumGhost
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
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#9
Quote:
Whenever I heard their car pulled into the driveway my heart sank and the dread returned to the pit of my stomach. Later on I did spend several years in a foster home where I nurtured the younger children and looked out for them. Sadly the foster parents were no better than the other parents. I tried to protect the younger children from their abuse but I failed. I tried so hard to help one boy who had been horribly abused in his own home before the foster home, but I found out a few years after I left that he didn't survive. People are ****. |
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MuseumGhost, unaluna
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#10
I always wished that I was fostered.
I always used to think about all the cool fun things I might do if I had a diffrent family, a family who loved me and wanted me as a child I also watched a lot of the story of tracy beaker so would think about her life a lot, and how much it's better than mine (I still do, think about being fostered I mean) I don't know if it would have been better, I mean you don't do you until you're their... but my mother was a monster. |
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MuseumGhost
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#11
I still read foster novels to this day and feel so envious of how the foster carers treatg the kids, with love and respect
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MuseumGhost, TishaBuv
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Apr 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
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#12
My fantasies were about living with a different family than mine, like several of the people I babysat for in my early teens. Their homes were so warm and loving. The children were clearly adored, individually valued, understood, and very much wanted. There was never any yelling; the kids were very well-behaved. There was always plenty of love to go around.
Wow. Talk about what a difference it would have made, growing up in an atmosphere like that! When I was an older teen, but still living at home, I dreamt a lot about living on my own. If it was a tent by some water, I would have taken it. But I used to stare at homes for sale, and wonder what the rooms were like inside. From really tiny houses to very large, expansive places, I fantasized about living in all of them. |
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