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ann yeltrab
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Member Since: Feb 2021
Location: californi
Posts: 11
3 yr Member
Default Jun 05, 2021 at 10:09 PM
  #1
Does anyone struggle with accepting that your mom neglected you emotionally? I do not remember her ever saying she loved me, smiling at me, touching me, teaching me anything, sharing "girl-time," saying anything positive about me. She never called me names, shouted at me, neglected my physical needs (food, clothing, shelter, education). She was generous with gifts but never with time to talk. As an adult, she never calls. If I call her, she just wants to get off the phone. When I graduated college, she did not express pleasure or happiness for me. She didn't even smile or give me a card for this accomplishment. At my wedding she high-fived with my brother but no hug or smile or card for me. She refused to come to see the first home I bought with my husband. Earlier in my adult life before marrying, she let me live at home when i needed to. (I paid all my own expenses.) After I married she became very cold as if she was angry with me about something. My brother decided to stop letting me spend time with his kids who were 11, 14, 16. My didn't blink an eye of concern. Yet i feel maybe i am being too sensitive. Maybe she did love me. Has anyone else oscillated back and forth in trying to figure out if they are suffering so much guilt and shame because of a relationship like the one I described?
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Default Jun 06, 2021 at 12:39 AM
  #2
Its like they do just enough to stay legal or whatever, but their heart isnt in it. There was no real attachment. I hope you can build a life with a chosen family and just forget the one you were born into.
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