[Troy]

My understanding that shrinks are just as crazy as the rest of us and that the military (including VA) is NOT the place for me to seek help is reinforced by the Ft. Hood incident - http://sn.im/t76t0

Not only is the shooter crazy, but those superiors who enlisted, trained, and promoted him are part of the problem. Not a single Christian, Jew, or non believer would have been permitted to continue on active duty, much less get promotions and treat patients if they acted like this guy. We need an investigation of all those who contributed to this act through the lack of balls to do anything about the terrorist before he acted.

And with the current climate, I seriously doubt whether anything serious will happen to him. Our top people refuse to recognize him as a terrorist. He is labeled criminal and in some parts of the world will be a hero.

I am not going to entrust myself to a bunch of crazies, hoping to find a morsel of sanity and relief from old wounds. I'd rather face gun toting soldiers than the enemy within.

As much as I appreciate all of you, your advice and encouragement, I've decided to continue inside the mask and avoid diagnosis and treatment. I'll be surprised if you hear another story from me, good or bad.

I've decided to turn off the stories and dreams and anxiety. I will not watch every tree line for the enemy. I will not be on alert for ambushes all these years later. I will arm myself and walk into the face of danger as always - no fear, take the consequences. When faced with a real threat, I will have the tools to deal with it.

Adios

[nowheretorun]

hi Tim, i know you are feeling the frustration... i hope you will give people a chance.. we are all human, we are all growing, we are all evolving.... sending you any good vibes you want to receive... ty for your Service to the people

[Yoda]

Originally Posted by Troy

As much as I appreciate all of you, your advice and encouragement, I've decided to continue inside the mask and avoid diagnosis and treatment. I'll be surprised if you hear another story from me, good or bad.

I've decided to turn off the stories and dreams and anxiety. I will not watch every tree line for the enemy. I will not be on alert for ambushes all these years later. I will arm myself and walk into the face of danger as always - no fear, take the consequences. When faced with a real threat, I will have the tools to deal with it.

Adios

Troy, please don't leave us. You are one of the few people here that I really relate to in a big way.

I understand your uncertainty about seeing a VA shrink since Ft Hood showed a very bad example of one.

I have fired shrinks of both my own and my son's along the way until I found one I was happy with. He used to be military himself. And he is absolutely the best shrink and one of the best physicians in general that I have ever known. If you have to fire a couple before you find one you can work with then so be it.

But I believe that you and I will survive more likely than the average never-seen-fear-in-their life folk. Sucks to have PTSD for sure but being alive still is a good thing and I would like to continue it.

[tunesinger]

Troy,
Your thought processes seem totally rational given the situation, but that alone shouldn't make you put yourself in harms way or go without the help you obviously have sought by coming to this group. You have every right to be angry. I think many of us are by what happened. But stuffing that anger will only make the PTSD symptoms worse. Maybe at least staying in the forums might help until you can find a therapist you trust? I am so sorry this is affecting you. I wish there was something more to say, but there just isn't except that it seems that people here do care about you.

[NuckingFutz]

Dear troy, please surprise me and come back. I am a veteran here in austin. I go through the va for everything...pdoc, therapist, labs, regular health care, even the gyn. They have helped me with housing, employment and i am filing for disability through them. Been going for years and you know what i think of them? World class service...hear that? World class. If someone offered to pay for the best of the best in the civilian world...i would tell em to move on because i am squared away. Yeah there are a lot of nut jobs for shrinks...i only have to look at my brother the shrink to know that...if i am nuckingfutz well he's um safely teaching instead of treating. You sound angry and justifiably angry. No one knew he hooked up with pakistan or about all the wire transfers with the sleeper terrorist pdoc. Its not like military intelligence did a security clearance backround check on him. An inside job was bound to happen...our military has stopped plenty and most we do not even hear about or we would all have pstd

[nowheretorun]

just saying sorry for calling you Tim, Troy...... (doh!)

it's scary to think this guy fell thru the cracks and was supposed to be helping people...that's true. that would worry me too.

and you are right people will probably either deny they ever thought this guy was odd or swear up & down they complained and no one listened.

BUT...there are extremists in every walk of life. sometimes they stick out like sore thumbs and sometimes they are invisible like ghosts. who knows how much this dr made himself really known...after the fact its easy to point at things and say...oh yeah we should have seen that....look he wore muslim garb...look he talked to muslim imams (?spelling) who were extremists.

i might be wrong but no law against dressing in muslim garb...or religious attire...then priests would be in trouble too...and as far as extremists look some meet with pro-life or the other side, or anti-war groups, etc.

this dr deserved a shot to be in service tho if he was healthy....muslim vets derve a doc that understands their needs and their backgrounds. i admit it...i don;'t. i probably wouldn't be a good healer for them..and it must be difficult for them especially coming home from fighting in muslim countries...that has to cause some internal conflicts.

DON'T GET ME WRONG...I AM IN NO WAY DEFENDING THIS DR'S ACTIONS. THERE IS NO WAY TO DO THAT. THEY WERE HORRIBLE AND HE SHOULD FACE THE TOTAL FOCUS OF THE LAW FOR THEM.

troy...don't fault the entire system for 1 asshole. there are good dr's out there. you know it. who knows what caused this guy to snap. i don't think he's going to walk off free into the sunset...he's not getting that get out of jail free card for this.

you owe it to yourself to not spend the rest of your life dealing with pain because of this guys actions. you deserve better. don't let this guy win. beat him at his game. heal. call him out and beat him by healing. walking around with a gun and hiding the pain isn't healing its being a walking time bomb.

so...please...stay...at least at pc...but better yet...search out a good doc or team of them...don't dump a system because of 1 guy. is it a perfect system? no but hey it's better than no system.

stumpy

[todarktosleep]

I agree with you on some points Troy, I have been through about eight
head shrinkers trying to find one that would help... no luck so far, that's
why I'm here. The only people that can truly understand what we went
through are those who have gone through it too... You know this!

Don't bail on us.

[MINIME]

I wanted to tell you what my therapist said to me. I have ptsd not from the war but something very yucky..and I told her I was going to cancel my appointment with the shrink which by the way is at the VA center, he works both public and privetly. I told her that if they can not help themselves then what they say is a bunch of crap. She got really quite and said you know that would be hurting another innocent person. She was talking about me and you and everyone else who decided this route. I know that its scary and you are looking for danger and even the threat of it makes you want to retreat but dont. Dont do this to you. If you need help find someone else. I know people will say you have not been to war you were not there dont talk to me like you know anything. If you read my post I wasnt in a war but I was in a battle to live and I know that feeling of being afraid and careful. I have read your posts and I do care about you very much. It actually hurts my heart to read that you would just stop looking for help. This shrink who did this was one shrink, and I know its hard to find anyone to help and this just makes it harder but you are worth the fight and worth the next try. I wish that I could sit with you for a while and let help you feel safe again, but my heart is right there with you. I am going to the kyrics and post a song for you . So that you have something from my heart to yours. OK

[todarktosleep]

Minime,
I'm sorry if my post was exclusive, i know there are other reasons for major PTSD and sometimes I forget that. Please take no offense.