[JustAPixie]

I asked this question in general as well, and someone suggested I do a poll here... Some usernames are gender nuetral and is sometimes confusing if you don't know if you're talking to a man or a woman... Would you like to know the gender of members? (A full discussion is in general)

[Winter Moon]

I personally wouldn't, and I'll explain my reason why.

I tend to me more skittish and nervous around guys, because in real life they scare me. I don't know why, they just do. But if I get to know a person and like them, then find out later that they're male, then I usually don't mind. If I can just look at people's genders, I'd likely about males like the plague where ever I could. XD And that would be a shame.

[JayS]

I would like to know the gender of members too.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

It matters not to me if the person I am communicating with is female or male I do not know about the others but I do not have a discriminal attitude toward either one.

Meg as a little girl of 3 who was damaged by 3 men, does not like men and there is only one male she trusts, whereas she trusts most women. I have been trying to teach her that just because someone is a woman does not mean she can be trusted or indeed should be trusted

I think balance in teaching that it is the person and how they treat others, as well as how they act, is important. This is important for functional adult relationships and is important in avoiding dysfunctional relationships

Morgana

[bebop]

it is pretty easy to find out gender of members. check out their profiles.

[Christina86]

Originally Posted by bebop

it is pretty easy to find out gender of members. check out their profiles.

Quite true. If a member chooses to share their gender, they can list it on their profile.

I sometimes like knowing whether someone is male or female, but for the most part I don't know if really matters all that much to me. Unless I make a mistake and call them by the wrong gender - then it gets a bit awkward.

[Sabrina]

Members can list their gender by choice on their profiles. It is not a simple matter of checking out their profile. If the member doesn't mention gender, we still won't know.

There should be a third choice...

Don't mind... As this is the one I would tick.

[sunsetsunrise]

I have opted to not give out any information about myself on my profile. I am more than happy to share personal info with those who I trust in my heart. I generally have a problem feeling safe with many people. Giving no info on my profile is one token way I can try to protect myself and hopefully contine posting at this website.

[JustAPixie]

Wow, Winter Moon... you said something that actually struck a cord with me... you are right, if I know for instance, that male members are posting in a thread I started, I would probably not be honest and open anymore... I would hide away again...

[Ygrec23]

I would like it to be decided by each member for him or herself. Take care.

[darkrunner]

Originally Posted by Christina86

Unless I make a mistake and call them by the wrong gender - then it gets a bit awkward.

I agree, Christina, it is awkward.
But I guess if someone doesn't make their gender obvious, they shouldn't be upset that mistakes and incorrect assumptions could occur!

I have seen the above happen in a thread ! There was even a picture of the person but it was very difficult to work out the gender. The person took offence....

[Gus1234U]

in what way is my gender, my diagnosis, my medication, or my social status relevant to my expressions in chat ? take me at "face/font" value, and respond to the me you see. please, thank you.

[lynn P.]

My personal opinion is - yes I prefer to know but I respect if someone doesn't want to give that info out. If I'm going to speak to someone regularly through PM's I feel it's relevant to at least know if it's a man or woman.

[griffenfirefly69]

Thanks for taking the poll. I'm kind of on the fence about it. I'd like to think I wouldn't talk any differently no matter what the gender however there are times when I know I do. There are also times when it makes a difference to the advice you offer. I'd like to know what others think.

[FooZe]

Here at PC, I'm usually less interested in those aspects of a person that do have to do with their gender than in those that don't. I may mention my gender in passing when it's relevant to something I'm posting, but most of the time it isn't -- so I don't.

Some members have said they're sometimes spooked by one gender or the other. I usually prefer not to spook someone I'm replying to, so I'd rather not make it obvious whether I'm of the gender they dread or not. If they insist on knowing, let them work a little to find out.

I don't usually mind when someone takes me for the "wrong" gender. It just says I've done a good job of keeping my gender out of the way. Also, some of my best friends are of the "wrong" gender and it's fine with me to get misidentified as one of them.

English didn't evolve to be gender-neutral. If I don't know someone's gender (or don't want to say), it's ungrammatical to say "they" -- but I do it anyway and applaud others' doing the same.

As for the original question, would I like to know the gender of members -- I'm sometimes curious but I'm not sure knowing would actually be better than not knowing.

[amandalouise]

I just posted a post then before I was done hit the wrong thing on my mouse and poof dont know where my post went, my post was something like

for me it doesnt matter but I voted no for a few reasons.

I was once in a site that had the gender profiling. but it didnt make a difference because most of the people there chose the opposite gender than what they really were. a lot of people take posting personal identifying things like gender on line as being dangerous to their safety, real or imagined because of their situations or mental disorder. the site ended up removing the gender profiling because it was causing people emotional harm and it wasnt helping anyway with people not being honest about their gender.

some people may be in life and death situations where domestic violence has happened and if their abuser knows they have a habit of being in mental health sites thats the first place they will look.

from personal experience I can tell you its not a good feeling when you find out an on line friend has been found out by their abuser because they matched gender and postings to their victim. its a helpless feeling thats hard to get rid of.

I have seen posts here where people have had to change their names and posting styles because someone in their life outside of PC found them here. I wouldnt want their identities found out and their lives put in danger because the site went to gender profiling.

there are teen agers here. we start gender profiling that may leave them open to pedophiles who may be here or come here posting as a teen girl or boy looking for friendship and help with some mental disorder they dont really have.

I would not want to see any teen girl or boy here put in danger because some jerk is looking for a boy or girl of a set age.

for the protection of everyone here I say no to gender profiling.

something to think about - if we start profiling by gender who knows whats next -
profiling by occupation?
profiling by race?
profiling by religion?
profiling by politics?
profiling by handicap?
profiling by IQ?
Profiling by how many times someone has been in prison? and for what?
profiling by how many times someone has been in the nut ward?

I bet we could all come up with things we would like to see profiled on other members profiles.

but for the safety and well being of everyone here I say no to gender profiling.