[rainbow8]

Is there a way to find out who has you on "ignore" besides trying to post in a thread and getting back the message that you can't because you are on "ignore"?

If someone has you on "ignore", will they be able to read a PM from you? It bothers me that I can't know why some people do that to me, and that I can't discuss it with them.

If I had someone on "ignore" and later took them off, would they know that other than if they tried to post in my thread?

If someone has me on "ignore", can they still see the "hugs" or "thanks" that I post in their threads?

Thank you.

[A Red Panda]

rainbow...

I think that they can see likes or hugs if they're able to be posted on threads that someone's made who has you on ignore.

I've never seen anywhere that would let you know who's ignoring you - that would sort of feel like a violation in some ways. I have some people on ignore, and unless they tried to post on my thread I'd really rather not have them know it - I obviously don't want contact with them, and some people wouldn't respect the boundary that I tried to set as they would be upset with my blocking them.

I have no idea if someone on your ignore list could PM you - but I think it would be rather disrespectful to PM someone that has you on ignore. I understand wanting to know why... but the person has set a boundary and they wouldn't want it to be crossed. It's difficult to avoid someone on a forum, whereas in real life you could just avoid them. No one has to say why they don't want to talk to someone or have contact with them... they don't owe it to the person they've blocked.

If they wanted to discuss it with you, they would have done that on their own. It hurts sure, but it wouldn't be respectful to intentionally impose yourself when they've set a boundary.

Anyway, I just thought I'd share my thoughts on it!

[rainbow8]

I appreciate your reply, Red Panda. I have trouble with boundaries and I can see how the "ignore" feature triggers that issue. It was very hard for me to use that feature, and hard to know that some people don't like me and/or are triggered by me. I want so much to be liked by everyone!

People have boundaries and you are right. They don't have to explain them. Like with my T and my driving by her house. I can see that I have difficulties I still have to work on.

Thank you!!!

[A Red Panda]

Yeah, I'd want to know why as well... it's hard to remember that people are allowed their private thoughts and opinions! It helps to remember that there are always going to be things you don't want to share as well - like if there's someone you dislike or find really annoying, for whatever reason... you wouldn't find it very fun to have to tell them that and why. I find reversing situations helpful

[lizardlady]

Rainbow, putting someone on ignore isn't necessarily about that person. I've put people on ignore because the subjects they post about trigger me. Can you see the difference? It doesn't mean I don't like that person. It means that there are things they talk about that disturb me.

[sabby]

As discussed many times throughout this forum, the ignore feature is used for a myriad of reasons by members. It would be counter-productive to try to figure out why if you have never had a specific issue with that member.

If a member has you on ignore, they will not receive pm's from you and they cannot post on your threads.

There is no option to tell you who has you on ignore. Hugs and thanks are still seen if the member has you on ignore.

Members have the ability to create their own best experience here. Using the ignore feature is part of that ability. That is a way of doing self care for many members and PC is not only about supporting others, it's about learning to do one's self care as well, and it can be a learning process.

[-jimi-]

If you are on someone's iggy, when you try to post in their thread, will you get told before or after trying to send a reply?

[lizardlady]

Originally Posted by jimi...

If you are on someone's iggy, when you try to post in their thread, will you get told before or after trying to send a reply?

Jimi, when this happened to me a box popped up when I tried to post my reply saying the person had me on ignore. I assume it works that way for everyone.

[-jimi-]

Ugh.. LOL annoying. I'd me a little mad not for someone putting me on iggy, but for losing a post I wrote.