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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:07 PM
  #1
How do I get off of someone's ignore list?

What am I doing wrong that means i'm on someone's ignore list?

i got enough to be distressed about just now, i do not need a ignore message to trigger me even further

how do i get removed from ignore lists so i can help others?
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:13 PM
  #2
maybe i should delete my account cause ignore lists mean i'm not wanted here
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:22 PM
  #3
I would ignore being on someone's ignore list. All it means is that you cannot post in a thread they start, nor can you quote/reply to them in other threads. You could still reply in other threads, just not by official name.

I know sometimes i get a little exuberant or stuffy in my posts and it rubs people the wrong way and they put me on ignore. Hey i gotta be me! But they can protect themselves from my triggering them by using ignore, so win-win. I be me and they be them.
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:27 PM
  #4
it does trigger me cause elsewhere, i basically got punished harshly for using the ignore list, when a moderator told me to ignore someone there, then the main admin there who was friends with the member i was told by a moderator to ignore, the admin got angry at me for following moderator instruction and yelled at me and got the harsh punsihments out against me, this is why its a massive trigger for me to get on a ignore list cause i fully expect to get harsh punishments from admin as soon as ignore is used at all, whether i'm on ignore list or using it, its why i dont use it instead what i do is just avoid opening the trigger button if i'm feeling unstable

i try to put possibly triggering stuff in the trigger button thing and use the red thing as well to warn people
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:28 PM
  #5
if i remember right, the punishment for me for using the ignore thing there by moderator instruction, was a forever ban
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:29 PM
  #6
i dont want to get forever banned
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 05:36 PM
  #7
ignore literally leads to forever ban thats the connection i got in my brain cause of what happened on that other place

if willowtigger has anything to do with ignore then admin gets angry and yells at her then throws her out

willowtigger freaking out now
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 06:09 PM
  #8
People have had me on ignore for YEARS. I'm still here. So what you are saying isnt necessarily true.

People here will try to help you realize that, that it isnt a banishment, even if it happened before.

Thats what this site is all about, to help people when they start panicking that something bad will happen, because it reminds them of something in their past.
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 06:12 PM
  #9
I've been on ignore as well. I do rub some people the wrong way. Not everyone is going to like what I say. I respect that they have the choice to ignore me.
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 06:21 PM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by downandlonely View Post
I've been on ignore as well. I do rub some people the wrong way. Not everyone is going to like what I say. I respect that they have the choice to ignore me.
How did you get off of ignore?

I noticed you used past tense
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 06:31 PM
  #11
I honestly don't know. That person chose to take me off ignore. But I might be on other people's ignore lists now. I try not to worry about what other people think of me.
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 06:42 PM
  #12
i mean someone avoiding stuff i say is one thing, whats making me get into major distress mode over this is what hapepned before

i was already in major distress mode over Tigger, this has made me worse

willowtigger shush now and not post again ever cause nobody wants to see posts from her
 
 
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 08:02 PM
  #13
Hi willowtigger, I'm sorry you're struggling with feeling badly about being put on ignore by someone. It's a cruddy feeling, for sure. In my time here, I've both been put on ignore and have used the function to put others on ignore when I have felt it was needed. Speaking as someone who has put others on ignore at times, sometimes it's a hard decision. I don't usually think those who I've put on ignore are bad people. They are just humans who I have boundaries with and choose not to engage with on an internet forum. Sometimes, it's just a matter of their own issues rubbing my issues the wrong way. It does hurt to be put on ignore, and our brains can go haywire thinking "what did I do??" when we get that ignore message. I've felt that way too. Also I don't think there is one blanket situation for ignore like "person gets put on ignore because they are bad and the person ignoring them is better." There are unique triggers, needs, and situations that may lead someone to put someone else on ignore. You are still a good person. You are still wanted here. You may not be able to control the actions of others, but you can control how you take care of yourself in response.
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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 08:07 PM
  #14
I've used it once years ago and regretted it almost immediately. Now I just avoid certain members that irritate me.

A few members blocked me. Now I don't bother with any of the threads they started. It was definitely a shock to discover it especially since my interaction with those members was minimal prior to it.

Note that anyone who has an ignore list should not start a general topic thread. -- There's plenty of evidence of members who have done this. A thread that is locked and started by a moderator is usually due to the original poster's ignore list.

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Default Aug 19, 2022 at 09:14 PM
  #15
Willowtigger, I've both been on ignore and put people on ignore. I agree that it is a shock to have the window pop up saying I am on ignore. My first thought was "what the heck did I do?" The thing about ignore is that is that it is more about the person doing the ignoring than it is about the person being ignored. To me it is a tool for self-care, not a way to punish someone.

As for your fear of being banned from the site. I've never heard of that happening at PC or MSF. Given your experience elsewhere your fear is understandable, but admin and mods here strike me as fair. I believe they would contact you by PM if there was a problem.

Maybe my personal experience will help you. Many years ago there was a problem between myself and a member I had on ignore. I got very upset (triggered) by what was going on. I sent about eleven zillion PMs to admins and mods freaking out. I'm still here so you can see I did not get banned. I got a nicely worded PM encouraging me to calm down plus remember that admin/mods are volunteers which was why I did not get an immediate response.

Hon, the only way you can get off someone's ignore list is to wait until they decide to take you off. That is hard, but the only way I know. Would it help you to frame it as the other person practicing self-care rather than that you did something wrong?

I hope you don't leave here. You post things that are helpful.
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Default Aug 20, 2022 at 05:48 AM
  #16
Willowtigger, the ignore list is a self-help tool we provide for each member's own personal care here. It is not something you can demand to be taken off of.

The tools we provide members are to help our members have a more enjoyable and rewarding community experience. It's something we've been doing for over 20 years here. I'm sorry you feel triggered by this tool that helps our members feel safe, but there's nothing we can do about it.

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Default Aug 20, 2022 at 08:10 AM
  #17
Willowtigger experience: ignore means automatic banned cause it's been done to her before as she said previously it's why ignore massive trigger

Willowtigger shush now never post again you getting forever ban for ignore button shh
 
 
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Default Aug 20, 2022 at 06:51 PM
  #18
((((((((willowtigger))))))))

I hope that you will stay here and continue to post.

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Default Aug 20, 2022 at 11:04 PM
  #19
There are days when I would like to ignore myself, for goodness sake! Please be good to yourself willowtrigger.
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Default Aug 21, 2022 at 06:59 AM
  #20
I’ve been on ignore and have used the feature. When ignored, I just figure that person is utilizing self-care. I don’t worry too much about what I might have said for them to take that step. There are thousands of members on this forum; we’re not going to sync with all of them. I do the same. If for whatever reason I prefer not to read a certain member’s post, the ignore feature is simply easy self-care.
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