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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
Posts: 3,512
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#1
How do you prefer to identify yourself when talking about trauma?
I am at a point where I am not a victim of abuse any more Calling myself a survivor makes me feel like one more hash mark on some creeps list of victims. Calling myself a fighter just seems flat out wrong as I am too peaceful I just can’t find a term that fits. Poor T called me a survivor last session and got his head bit off. Poor guy. He has been SO sensitive about everything. He never thought that calling me a survivor would set me off. Now I need a word... __________________ There’s been many a crooked path that has landed me here Tired, broken and wearing rags Wild eyed with fear -Blackmoores Night |
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Fuzzybear
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Skeezyks
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
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#2
Well... my circumstances are such that I would not be in a situation where I would need to identify myself in relation to trauma. But, were I to be, I think I would probably just try to describe what occurred rather than to apply a term to it. I couldn't describe myself as being a victim, although that perhaps is what I was. I just dislike the term. And I don't feel much like a survivor because I still struggle with it even after all of these years. Fighter I don't think works either. I'm not a "fighter" in any sense of the word. If I had to use some term to describe what happened to me I'd probably say I was a target; because that's what it felt like. I doubt, though, that is quite what you had in mind when you posted this. Hopefully there will be other members who will have better suggestions.
__________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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KYWoman, OliverB, seeker33
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Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: 8CS / NYS / USA
Posts: 9,148
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#3
Quote:
"lets not label this victim or survivor, Im a human being doing the best I can right now, thats all I am a human being" they would smile at me and say yes you are a human being and you are doing the best you can right now. |
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seeker33
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
Posts: 3,512
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#4
Thanks! For a crazy cat lady I really hate boxes. For now we have compromised on resilient and resourceful. They don’t do much to explain the circumstances but the don’t bug me either.
__________________ There’s been many a crooked path that has landed me here Tired, broken and wearing rags Wild eyed with fear -Blackmoores Night |
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Poohbah
Member Since Nov 2017
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,417
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#5
I hate both terms victim and survivor, too. I feel that a survivor is just another way of saying "victim". I don't call myself any special term. I refer to my past as "things that happened to me". I don't like the idea of basing my identity on events or symptoms. I may say "my trauma" but that's like saying "my brown hair" or "my toothache". But I definitely wouldn't call myself "a victim or survivor of toothache".
If there's a situation where a term has to be used I like saying something like "people with trauma have these symptoms". But I don't use this as my everyday identity. To me, trauma is a set of symptoms I have, not who I am. __________________ Complex trauma Highly sensitive person I love nature, simplicity and minimalism |
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Omers
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: Wonderland-Everyoneland
Posts: 1,533
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#6
"Another person with parents that shouldn't have been parents"
__________________ Crazy, inside and aside Meds: bye bye meds CPTSD and some sort of depression and weird perceptions "Outwardly: dumbly, I shamble about, a thing that could never have been known as human, a
thing whose shape is so alien a travesty that humanity becomes more obscene for the vague resemblance." I have no mouth and I must scream -Harlan Ellison- |
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Omers
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