Feeling Guilty About How I Treated A Friend

Emeriss · Oct 01, 2010 at 02:07 PM

In the (recent) past, I did something that really hurt a friend of mine emotionally. This was never my intention, it was something I did because I felt lonely, and even though I knew it was wrong, it made me feel a bit better about myself for a brief period of time. However, it went farther than I intended, and thus my friend wound up being hurt by my own stupid actions.

The friend, if you could still call them that, doesn't know that it was me. We've stopped talking for a different reason, so even though I'd like to apologize for it, I feel like that would just re-open old wounds, and hurt them even more with the additional information.

The guilt at hurting a friend and also the fear of being caught are driving me a little crazy. I know what I did was wrong, but I'd really like any advice you can offer. What would you do if you were in a similar situation? Would you confess to your friend and apologize for it, or just try and deal with the guilt?

(I'm sorry if this isn't the right place for the thread)

sick · Oct 01, 2010 at 09:05 PM

It is always better to be upfront with a friend it is hard though if it is going to hurt her i don't know.l It is better to hear it from you though not from others and have your apology with it.

Muser · Oct 02, 2010 at 07:31 AM

Glad you posted....and I think this is a fine place to put it

If you are not talking anyway maybe the apology would be a good place to start over.

Wishing you the very best with this

Perna · Oct 02, 2010 at 08:32 AM

If you have additional problems with the friendship (the not talking for a different reason) then I don't see how you can make things "worse" through your honesty. Apologizing rarely hurts anything. While it's true your friend might be angry to learn it was you who did/started whatever, if they are already unhappy for another reason too, might as well "help" the situation by being honest and getting your own worries stable so at least you don't have to worry about being "found out".

Gus1234U · Oct 02, 2010 at 08:37 AM

dear Emeriss,, acknowledging your feelings is the first step. you will know what to do, i believe you already know what you have to do... just finding the courage to do it is hard.... so ,, imagine the best and worst outcomes, the real one will likely be somewhere in the middle,,, and people do surprise one, occassionally,, think of it as a major leap forward in life skills.. best wishes,, Gus

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Feeling Guilty About How I Treated A Friend

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sick Member Member Since Sep 2010 Location: canada Posts: 122 14	Oct 01, 2010 at 09:05 PM #2 It is always better to be upfront with a friend it is hard though if it is going to hurt her i don't know.l It is better to hear it from you though not from others and have your apology with it.
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Muser Member Member Since Jul 2010 Posts: 363 14 46 hugs given	Oct 02, 2010 at 07:31 AM #3 Glad you posted....and I think this is a fine place to put it If you are not talking anyway maybe the apology would be a good place to start over. Wishing you the very best with this __________________ Noun1.muser - a reflective thinker "A true friend will keep your secrets and love you without judgment or conditions"
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