[Abtin]

Hello my dear friends,
I can’t cope with dependence to other feminine gender, at ending of each relationship I am failure, I begging them that don’t leave me alone, I can guess I afraid of being alone, what do you think? What is the main problem and what can I do to solve this issue? I should be grateful if you share your precious information with me.
Best Wishes...

[Leed]

Hello ~ Could it be possible that you are clinging to them too much? Perhaps you depend on them TOO MUCH and don't give them enough freedom. Sometimes we care too MUCH about people and we smother them. We have to back off and let them have some space to be themselves. If you hold on too tightly to someone, they will surely leave you. If you let go, they will most likely stay.

I hope that made sense. Best of luck to you and take care. Hugs, Lee

[(JD)]

Everyone depends upon something or someone in life... what seems to be your problem is that you feel you can't live, or aren't complete, without another?

Can you try and think about what you gain from such a relationship? Does it fulfill something you relished from your mom, or missed? Did someone important to you leave the home while you were young, and so you either fear another doing that, or perhaps are leaving them (either so they won't leave you first, or to "get back" at whomever left you?)

You didn't give much information... post some more after you've thought some... let us know.

[Abtin]

Thank you so much for your kind reply.
Everyone depends upon something or someone in life... what seems to be your problem is that you feel you can't live, or aren't complete, without another?
I afraid of being alone, I am frightened that they don’t confirm me, in fact I feel I have doubt about myself, I don’t know how can I express my feeling to you, but when I am with my girl friend I am so relaxed because I feel everything is Ok and I am acceptable by Feminine Gender, I can concentrate on my daily works, so I have high frequency of positive energy, then leaving me by them leads to losing my energy and I beg them until they come back, and all of the time they go away from me and won’t return.
Can you try and think about what you gain from such a relationship? Nothing except love by feminine gender. Does it fulfill something you relished from your mom, or missed? I feel I will be complete with them, I miss them soon, and I am forced to request them to eliminate my heart ache. Did someone important to you leave the home while you were young, Not at all and so you either fear another doing that, or perhaps are leaving them (either so they won't leave you first, or to "get back" at whomever left you?)
Best Wishes...

[madisgram]

abtin, imho one cannot truly love another unless one learns to love one's self first. if we place our value about our own "being" by a relationship, then when they leave, we are void of our own self worth.

[lavieenrose]

I agree with Madisgram. A healthy relationship cannot succeed if your positive feelings are dependent upon an external source. That kind of neediness and desperation will drive others away. I hope that you can get professional help to understand the sources of your dependence and strengthen your relationship with yourself. Then, you'd have a stronger basis for a relationship. I'm afraid there aren't any shortcuts.

[Abtin]

I am really Happy and Proud to have sympathetic friends like you,
Thank you so much.
Best Wishes...