[siljie]

So for a long time I've been having a lot of problems with my self esteem... Sometimes I really do feel pretty, but when I step into the real world at my school or see someone beautiful all of that self confidence seems to melt away. Years and years of people putting down the way I look and critisizing every little different action and all the abuse I have been through has really taken a tole on me. I always wear a jacket to school because I just feel fat. I am underweight(but a normal amount of body fat) and lots of people tell me I'm skinny/too skinny but I still feel so crappy and want to lose more weight.. I'm too white and not curvy, my nose and chin are different, and I don't follow any specific trends. Are there any tips on building better self esteem? I hate feeling fat and ugly.

[Jazz91]

for one you are beautiful and until you believe that yourself no one else will
secondly weight is nothing its what is on the inside that counts you will find that ppl with beauty on the outside have ugly insides
third steriotypes these days are rediculous ignore the steriotype or it will make you feel horrible

[siljie]

Thank you for the advice

[Elana05]

Originally Posted by siljie

So for a long time I've been having a lot of problems with my self esteem... Sometimes I really do feel pretty, but when I step into the real world at my school or see someone beautiful all of that self confidence seems to melt away. Years and years of people putting down the way I look and critisizing every little different action and all the abuse I have been through has really taken a tole on me. I always wear a jacket to school because I just feel fat. I am underweight(but a normal amount of body fat) and lots of people tell me I'm skinny/too skinny but I still feel so crappy and want to lose more weight.. I'm too white and not curvy, my nose and chin are different, and I don't follow any specific trends. Are there any tips on building better self esteem? I hate feeling fat and ugly.

Hi siljie,

Do you see a therapist? Abuse and criticizing are serious and do really take a toll on your self-esteem so that it may be hard even see who you really are anymore. This is what I found. By looking at the wounds that have occurred internally (emotionally) you will begin to see yourself differently on the outside and be more able to offer yourself the kindness and care you deserve... Even the most beautiful person will never be able to see their beauty until they can offer themselves kindness. But it is understandably hard when we have been put down by others. We just need to see how wrong they were...
Sending supportive thoughts your way.

[siljie]

I don't see a therapist anymore but I used to. I will maybe be starting it again but with a different T that doesn't try to force her opinions down my throat. thank you

You might find something useful in Dr. Brown's lecture: