[TealOrca12]

Ever get that awful, inescapable anxious feeling right before you have to do something important?

Tomorrow, I am defending my dissertation to finally finish a doctoral degree. I worked so hard for this, and I know I *should* be happy and proud. However, I am terrified of this whole thing. It's not so much the speaking in front of people, it's more that feeling of not being prepared enough. I don't know if more time would help, though. I am just wanting to get this over with. But I really hate this horrible feeling of fear that comes with anxiety. I know the absolute worst that can happen is I will "fail" (which is unlikely, they won't let you defend if that is a possibility) and even IF that happens, I'm not going to die or get diagnosed with a horrid medical condition or the world's going to end. But sometimes telling ourselves these things doesn't help! The feeling is so visceral. You just want to jump out of your own skin! I am trying to own this, and to approach the experience as being in the present, taking my time, doing my best, rather than seeing it as an awful ordeal to be "gotten over with." I hope I can channel present-moment awareness and be strong and do well tomorrow. Just wanted to vent this. Anxiety sucks!

[Callmebj]

Teal, I have a feeling you might be a perfectionist that puts a lot of pressure on yourself. I'll bet you are fully prepared, and do a great job. Then you will wonder, what the heck was I scared of. I get myself all worked up for those important times; then when it's over, I feel it was a piece of cake.
Hugs, bj