[passionfruit3]

I've not been at psych hospital in a bit.i was having a terrible time with self harming but right now I'm in so much pain from it it's also becoming something less appealing.pain in general is but I seem to have a lot of it.yesterday I was back at the er clutching my stomach while I waited two hours to be seen in a waiting room with virtually no patients.they seemed to have rooms for everyone but me when I was seen.the doctor was for once kind.pressing on my stomach she felt like it was my Gerd or acid reflux acting up she the second doctor said the same but i felt he just wanted to get rid of me cause he knew me.so he talked fast and said he agreed and said to give me medicine so I could go home.the medicine is a white chalky liquid I've had it before it always works but that was this morning and now I'm Back to feeling sick though at the pharmacy they said meds can do this.but a lot of the time when I'm not sick I feel like something is wrong with me.like I'm dying.or things are going by to slowly.or things don't feel real.and sometimes I need like some type of sensation to feel alive. Cause it's like I can't feel things.i don't know but maybe it's the reason I self harm.i just don't know.i just know I don't feel.i don't even cry anymore really.though I did cry a few days ago.its like I can't connect emotionally to myself anymore. And I'm drained.i don't know if medication can do this i just don't like the feeling.

[Sunflower123]

Are you seeing a therapist and a pdoc on an outpatient basis? Can you go to your primary care doctor for your stomach pain? Sounds like you need a second opinion.