Have you ever acted out in a way you regret?

Attempt #3

A few years ago I acted out impusively. I try not to think about it but whenever I do it’s usually when I feel down. The past few months I’ve been really good at ignoring people stares and smiles. I don’t know what to do anyomore. Sometimes I feel like I owe people an explanation and I should not have to. I completely humiliated myself and disappointed others.

How do you move on and not let mistakes define you?

You learn from mistakes. You need to tell us what exactly happed, to know if it was actually a real mistake.

Do you want to tell us what happened exactly?

So many times.....You´re not alone in acting impulsively and then regretting it, at times. Usually i try to apologize to the person it affected, and then i move on with my life and promise myself to never do it again. (with varying levels of success to be honest)

Yes and I would think most people would respond in the affirmative here. You move on by realizing you are human and as such are fallible at times. You forgive yourself for your mistakes, learn what you can from them, make amends where you can and move on. I know that can be easier said than done and I wish you luck moving on.

I have acted out inappropriately so many times and I believe I felt bad after each episode. Regret, guilt, the gamut of emotions one would expect. As I grew older I thought I would become better at harnessing that behavior and I have. However, I still act out occasionally and it's equally as difficult to fully understand exactly why I do it. I end up apologizing if I hurt or offended anyone, and generally feeling crappy about myself afterward regardless.

The only answer I can really think of is forgiveness. Of course, forgiving oneself is not easy for most of us. In fact, it's much easier for me to forgive others. But you really have to learn to do it and also learn from each episode.

By learning new actions to correct the destructive or harmful ones of the past.

I've learned to accept my actions and behaviors. I can't change the past. I can only learn from it. The best thing to do is to *try* to act differently when you react to someone. If not, oh well ... we can *try* again next time.

We can't make everyone happy. No matter how angelic you act or react, someone will get offended. So goes life.

I did one acting out thing I really regretted. I was on a game-with-forum for young people (most were 8-13, I think, but of course a lot stayed on when they grew older, often quitting the game and only visiting the forum and socializing with their friends). I was in a wheelchair and my mother had ordered me to find a regular sport to participate in. And chess didn't count. So I asked for ideas on the forum. Someone told (by pm) me to stop .. - don't know the translation of the word, basically a physical way of whining, like you tell someone who starts using a wheelchair after only (so no comorbid conditions) a (non-fracturing) stub of their toe - and just go on football (soccer in the US).

Well I lashed out and called her all sorts of names.

She sent a screenshot to the moderating team - I was reprimanded, of course. (You got "points" for breaking major rules, 100 points and you were banned. Usual punishment was 5 or 10 points, maybe 20 points if your offense was truly severe. I got 10 points for doing this. Never got another point in my time there ) Was unable to apologize because she'd blocked me.

I alapogize for not responding and I appreciate everyone taking the time the time to respond. Sorry.

I know what you mean, bohemian. I've been there. A source of inspiration to me is what I see in the news. Lots of people in very high places, like in entertainment and politics and elsewhere, get caught acting wrong and even disgracefully. They get found out for behavior that they should be so totally ashamed of. Do they go crawling under a rock, afraid to show their faces? No they don't. They run for high office in government and they carry on with other careers. They say, "Well, I made an error in judgement." They fully expect forgiveness. Some of them get it to.

I mean - just watch the evening news. Talk about people humiliating themselves and disappointing others! Geesh. I don't know how some of them have the guts to walk out of their houses. But they do. They even go in front of cameras. They carry on. They seem to have no trouble forgiving themselves. I guess we could take a lesson.

I'd say don't set off people in general then you don't get the implusiveness. Sometimes it is not about how much good are you it is about how bad you can be.

The new year is around the corner. Maybe I can try to leave it behind me . Thanks to all those that took the time to comment. This thread is pretty much done.

I have a habit of getting boiled up over injustices to people and will snap and act-out in their defence. I tend to get very negative responses and, even though my reactions were justified, later regret speaking up. I have made things awkward with more than one acquaintance for my standing up for those who could not defend themselves and I sometimes wonder if my acting out was worth it.

For example a group of my boyfriend's family were mercilessly bullying another family member to the point he was in tears. I called them out on it - very angrily - and came to the young man's defence. That was August and these family members have not spoken to my boyfriend since. Standing up for the boy might have been the right thing to do but I regret deeply the fall-out I created.