[Marylin]

My narc sister attacked me in a narcissistic rage again yesterday.I had cut off physical contact for 4 years.We were exchanging texts supposedly over our mothers health but she kept pushing the boundaries and hurting me with her vicious words and denial of the abuse she put me through.I got angry.Now I have blocked her and am resolved to go 100% no contact and stay that way.

The reason I am sad is cos I allowed her back in.Also my niece doesn't care about me as much as I care and love her.She didn't do a letter for me saying she helps out for the benefits people not that she helps out much but even so I needed her help.She was away studying in the US but if she cared she would have helped me with this as it's so important.She has also told her mum I put pressure on her to see me and message me and I didn't realise she didn't want to see me so much...that hurts.

What also hurts is I realise I am all alone in the world cos if I was in trouble or ill and needed help and support my niece wouldn't help me so that means she isn't someone who cares for me much.But that is ok I know she is young and getting her independence and needing her freedom.It just makes me sad.
I will be ok. I will focus on getting fit and healthy and sorting my health and home and building a meaningful and happy life for me cos I deserve it.It is just sad that I have no one to count on.