[Fuzzybear]

Following on from the “age of dying” thread

Possible trigger:

How would you feel if one of your friends died from their mental health disorder? . Or even one of your not-So-friends?

having been their myself with my friend bethany, I know it is a real shock.

you don't realise just how serious it is, until they actually do it

here she was, barely in to her 20's, seemed happy on the outside, but 1 day she just decided no. I've had enough

poor girl. if only people had listened to her

but you should never judge or under estimate their suffering

you just don't know how they feel

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you so much for making this thread, Fuzzybear! I feel like it's VERY important to talk about all of this! I'd feel DEVASTATED of course, especially if it was a close friend! Not only does it mean that I wasn't able to help him/her, but that he must have been suffering A LOT to get to that point! It's certainly NOT a thing anyone would want to experience! I completely agree with what raging vortex has already wonderfully, wisely said better than I ever could! She's giving us lots of great, wise, wonderful words! We SHOULD NOT absolutely judge anyone, especially anyone who's struggling so much and who's feeling SI! But of course I know none of you wonderful people here on PC would ever judge anyone! Many other WOULD judge, though, and it truly sucks! Even if we can't help other people, at least not as much as we would hope to or want to, we should at least avoid hurting them and judging them even further, but many people DO EXACTLY THAT and IT SUCKS! I'm so sorry for all of those who are being or have been judged by these ignorant and mean people! You don't deserve to suffer AT ALL! Nobody deserves to suffer AT ALL, certainly NOT YOU! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT, EVERYONE! I'm so sorry for all of those who have experienced this or have lost a close friend or anyone else! I hope you'll all be able to get through all of this if you haven't already! It must be terrible, but you CAN ALL get over it! Please don't give up hope! Just try to hang on as much as you call can! Sending many hugs to you, Fuzzybear, and to everyone else, including all of you wonderful people here on PC!

My family lost my youngest nephew to suicide two years ago in June. It's hard to adequately express feelings of such a loss. Devastation, of course. Having "Wish I hads...Should haves...Could haves" running through your head. Any death of someone close to you is rough, old or young, but deaths because of suicide are uniquely horrible.

I never utter that "He committed suicide." That implies a choice. I do not believe that suicide is really a choice, unlike many people. Depression, or whatever leads to suicide, is just as much death by disease as cancer or heart disease, in my book.

I have to confess that when people express suicidal thoughts or plans on forums like this, I don't often respond in any major way. I know that sounds odd, but the pain is still so extreme and I haven't yet figured out how to help effectively other than suggest the usual suggestions. Doing so is important, but often doesn't seem enough. Really, I wish I could reach through the virtual barrier of the internet and hug a person so hard that the thoughts and extreme pain are squeezed out of their brain.

I know that if my nephew hadn't been triggered to do what happened that day, that during these two years since he would have experienced happiness again. I'm not saying that pain wouldn't return or that it wouldn't have lasted for a while after that day, but it would have eased.