[Kbaker17]

So, two weeks ago my husbands grandmother passed away, it wasn’t unexpected, but it happened very quickly. Last Saturday there was a memorial service that was held, and my mother in-law was by herself. My father-in-law literally left town, leaving the country, that morning for two weeks. My mother-in-law struggles with the use of alcohol and smoking. The only other person who lives with her is her husband, but they don’t even acknowledge each other. My sister-in-law doesn’t help my husband and I check on our mother nor does she help with anything. Overall my husband and I are struggling and stressing out about what might happen is our mother is home alone. Her alcohol consumption has doubled since the passing over her mother. The stress is making my husband and I go crazy and we do not know what to do, except go there everyday. She lives about 30 minutes from us and it gets exhausting really quick. Overall we need help coping and managing the stress this is bringing onto us. Any suggestions ?

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm afraid the only thing you and your husband can do for her is point out to her the resources she can reach out to to deal with her alcoholism, Kbaker17! You can't force her to get help. That is HER responsability. You can both give advice and suggestion but the final choice is up to her. There ARE resources available and she CAN get help but she needs to take the first step! Aside from that you can only try to check out on her through phone or by seeing her regularly, although once a day may definitely prove to be too much for both of you! At the very least she isn't alone at home even though it doesn't seem like she has much of a support system! Check on her and insist towards her husband and your sister-in-law to do the same! I'm so sorry I don't have a lot of advice to give to you! Take care of yourselves as well since you can't fully take care of others if we're not taking care of ourselves as well! I hope your mother will take that first step and that se will be able to get the help she needs and DESERVES! Wish you the best of luck in BOTH your mother's healing and in ALL of your family's lives! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you and your family, Kbaker17!