Marylin

Well mixed feelings and also trouble with sleep.Last two days Ive been getting about 4 hours sleep during the night,before that I got 9 hours and even 20 hours so my sleep isn't consistent.I am not coping well during this lockdown being couped up indoors isn't good for my mental health.I am very depressed and my anxiety has got worse.I don't feel well.

Deilla

I'm coping well tonight. I had a major issue but found something to take care of it. So I'm feeling lots better. I'm working on one of my classes to pass the time. I think it's going well and it's helping me to feel better about myself.

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“If you don’t like something, change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” — Mary Engelbreit

When you change the way you look at the world, the world changes.

My Personal Blog - The Empowered Finger Writes

Breaking Dawn

Things are so weird right now, I wish I knew what to do. But I seem to be coping ok right now.

Marylin

I had a stressful day.My blood pressure was checked by the nurse,it was much too high,been high for years actually, 166/112 and I've had all the blood pressure meds and they all give me severe side effects.So nurse consulted with the doctor and doctor said a new pill came out and I am to try it.I collected the new med lecardipidine and read the leaflet it has the same ingredients of alodipine which was one of the ones gave me bad effects and the leaflet said if thats happened not to take them so I am not gonna take them.Also they have side effects of angina,irregular heartbeats and interferes with electric impulses to the heart.

I went to shop and was confronted for not wearing a laynard for exemption from wearing a face mask only had a badge on,that was stressful.

Got home got messaged by my gardener he came last october he said and did work on the garden and I owed him for it.I had sent him a message cancelling that day on messenger,he said he didn't see that message and came and worked.We argued I said I know he didn't come he insisted he came and trimmed my apricot tree.I do leave the gate open and sometimes he'd come when I am asleep and not tell me he'd arrived and just do work and leave.I was so angry cos he said he had an invoice for the work but he never used to invoice me he 'd come do the work ususally I'd see him and I'd pay same day or day after by bank transfer cos I trusted him.I said to him why aren't you sending me invoices?Also I got so angry I said I couldn't trust him and was gonna sack him as my gardener.

Then I spoke to my mum,she said if I let the gate stay open and he let himself in and worked and I didn't see him and thought I'd cancelled then it's a misunderstanding and I should pay him.So I paid him told him that;s probably what happened and if I cancel in future he is to confirm by text he's not coming and if he does come he's not to start work and go without knocking on my door to say he's here.And we settled the dispute amicably.But it really upset me and stressed me and probably didn't do my blood pressure any good.

Discombobulated

I felt spaced much of today but got out for my exercise which was Good, spoke to a dear friend by phone tonight which was also good.

Mountaindewed

I’m coping decently. I mean, I was happy the majority of the day. My general anxiety was fine. My moods were kinda goofy this afternoon. I think I may have been having a slight panic attack. Although I still feel confident in my decisions. But I still think I may have freaked out a bit. I took my night meds in shifts again. Half at 3:30 and then I’ll take the other half in 15 minutes.

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You know sometimes it’s hard to see or say the words that torture me, but inside I know exactly how I feel. The things that I can’t say out loud I’ll find a place to write them down- Postcards- James Blunt

Club 46.

Deilla

I'm using my DBT coping skills. I started feeling sad and lonely. I did REST and self-soothing with essential oils, beautiful gifs, nature sounds and an iced coffee.

__________________
“If you don’t like something, change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” — Mary Engelbreit

When you change the way you look at the world, the world changes.

My Personal Blog - The Empowered Finger Writes

Marylin

I got up early today I am feeling a bit ill cos I know my blood pressure is high usually I take CBD which lowers it but I ran out end of December and I only just had the funds to purchase more,it should arrive today,so hopefully I can take it and lower my blood pressure.I must make sure not to run out again.Otherwise I am ok apart from burititis in my left arm which is really painful and has been going on for over a week about 10 days,its so uncomfortable and painful at night I have to take painkillers to sleep.

Deilla

I'm having a difficult time. I think I may just go back to bed. This is when I'm usually up and pretty active with my games, but I am anxious about upcoming events in the US. I've been watching the news. I need to rest and relax. I'll go to bed and put some rain sounds on.

__________________
“If you don’t like something, change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” — Mary Engelbreit

When you change the way you look at the world, the world changes.

My Personal Blog - The Empowered Finger Writes

ann bog

Not coping well. Over eating and reacting to childish behavior. I really need to focus on my tasks and not be distracted by nonsense. I could be a little more structured with snacks between meals but for the time being I prefer to mindlessly indulge.

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certainly searching, dreaming

not my formal self