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Sunmoonstars44
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Default May 06, 2021 at 07:48 PM
  #1
This Sunday....not too fond of this time of year. My mom passed away April 15th 2016, roughly a month before Mother's Day. So, makes the holiday harder on me. She was the one person I always knew I could go to for support. Most people could, she was just that kind of person. Hardest thing is, we hadn't spoken in a year, nothing ugly, just a misunderstanding. When I saw her again, she was not able to verbalize and could barely move her limbs. Was told she was not responsive, but when I went in to see her she made grunts and reached her hand out to me. Looked like she wanted to tell me something. What it is, will never know. I do know she always worried about me possibly the most though. Oldest, but the one who was and, once again, is the most lost. Sigh. Sorry for my self pitying rant. Have a lot to process right now and just venting in any way I can is helping in tiny increments. Thanking fir reading this if you hot this far. I appreciate it.
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Default May 07, 2021 at 09:37 AM
  #2
not a fan of this time either

my mother doesn't want to know me, at all.

still trying to

Possible trigger:


sooo
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Default May 14, 2021 at 08:00 PM
  #3
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Originally Posted by Sunmoonstars44 View Post
This Sunday....not too fond of this time of year. My mom passed away April 15th 2016, roughly a month before Mother's Day. So, makes the holiday harder on me. She was the one person I always knew I could go to for support. Most people could, she was just that kind of person. Hardest thing is, we hadn't spoken in a year, nothing ugly, just a misunderstanding. When I saw her again, she was not able to verbalize and could barely move her limbs. Was told she was not responsive, but when I went in to see her she made grunts and reached her hand out to me. Looked like she wanted to tell me something. What it is, will never know. I do know she always worried about me possibly the most though. Oldest, but the one who was and, once again, is the most lost. Sigh. Sorry for my self pitying rant. Have a lot to process right now and just venting in any way I can is helping in tiny increments. Thanking fir reading this if you hot this far. I appreciate it.
I'm sorry for your lost. I understand how you are feeling because I lost my mom to in 2009. Mother day is always hard for me.
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Default May 15, 2021 at 08:45 AM
  #4
I'm very sorry for your loss, truly, and can say that I know how difficult it is for you.

My mum passed away on April 14th this year in hospital in Brisbane. Covid restrictions were in place until the 15th. I wasn't allowed to see her, neither were my two sisters and brother who had all flown across the country to be with her, and she was alone when she died. We were told we couldn't see her or even enter the hospital beyond the reception desk for the protection of other patients.

She was too short of breath to be able to speak on the phone so all we could do was text her to tell her we loved her and say our goodbyes. That we couldn't be there to comfort her makes it feel like we failed her somehow.

Yet within the hour of her passing we all were allowed to go see her body. She was still in the same bed in the respiratory ward and there were other patients around. We were even told we weren't required to wear masks. It makes no sense to me that we were allowed to enter as a group and didn't need masks after it was too late but while she was alive we got turned away at the doors.

Nothing else had changed; restrictions were still in full effect and we still were in close proximity to other patients and the nurses tending to them, so why was it so important to keep us away for the protection of other patients while she was alive but suddenly A-okay for us to be in there as a a group when she wasn't?

It was all so recent and it weighs so very heavily on me that we couldn't see her and that she had to die alone because of a rule that someone decided didn't matter after it was all too late for her.

Mother's day following so closely I think made it so much worse. I have never been so angry, sad and bitter in my life and I have no idea how to deal with it. The loss is hard enough let alone the circumstances surrounding it and difficulty of all the mother's day advertising and seeing people celebrate while I barely hold it together long enough to buy some groceries.

I don't mean to hijack your thread but I related so much to your post and don't really have anywhere else to vent at the moment since trying to talk about it with family and friends reduces as all to blubbering messes.

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Default May 15, 2021 at 01:10 PM
  #5
So Sorry for your Losses! Sorry for being late in replying as well. Losing a Mother can certainly be hard. i am sure that she Loved you both very much. Even if you weren't able to see her, i think she still undersatood the Love that you had for her. please try to be kind to ourselves. Try to use this day to celebrate her and remember her perhaps. Of course you don't have to do that if it is too painful. Hugs. i Hope you both were able to spend a wonderful Mother's day. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to ALL of you, @Sunmoonstars44 and @PaperThin and @raging vortex and @Buffy01, your Families, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
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Default May 18, 2021 at 03:47 PM
  #6
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Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky View Post
So Sorry for your Losses! Sorry for being late in replying as well. Losing a Mother can certainly be hard. i am sure that she Loved you both very much. Even if you weren't able to see her, i think she still undersatood the Love that you had for her. please try to be kind to ourselves. Try to use this day to celebrate her and remember her perhaps. Of course you don't have to do that if it is too painful. Hugs. i Hope you both were able to spend a wonderful Mother's day. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to ALL of you, @Sunmoonstars44 and @PaperThin and @raging vortex and @Buffy01, your Families, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
I celebrated for my nephew.
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