Ramblings from my mind

Its not just one thing.

I'm having some friend issues, sort of. They're my issues. They're small. I have a friend who..........I like as a person and we connect very well emotionally. He is also often saying things thing that hurt me. Not on purpose. But he has a very skewed way of looking at the world. I know that if I keep him as a close friend, I'll continue to feel upset. Maybe. I'd like to recognize that he has issues and not take what he says to heart. Maybe even say something back like "I disagree" or "that's not how I look at the world." Or even " I think you're wrong."

I have another friend...a female...who I'm frustrated by lately. She didn't wish me happy birthday on my birthday. That's small too, actually. Its not like we are married. Or super tight. Though she has been a good friend to me. I will let this go. She has been stressed and she's extremely busy, has ADD, and she's an extrovert with way more people in her life. Theres a comment she made a little while back that's bothering me, but I can talk to her about it if it really bothers me.

I wish I had closer friendships. Maybe I need a roommate. Lol. Or a boyfriend, lol. Being single can be hard sometimes. It should come with its own merit badge / trophy: "I carried the bookcase up the stairs by myself" and "I put my hair in a ponytail by myself when my arm was broken."

That's kind of it. Lol. I do have some things in life that are stressful. And my m.h. issues...don't make that easier, lol. But I'm also....trying to be kind to myself, emphasis on trying, and trying to balance taking responsibility for my part in conflicts: "and it's ok and I want to do better."

I'm looking for a new apartment and a job. I just signed up to take a pottery class and yoga. Two separate classes lol. Exercise really helps and I miss being in an art room.

Life can be hard sometimes and the same can go for Friendships i think. i think talking to them about this and how you're feeling may be a good solution if you believe they can handle that. Things may even get better if you talk it through with them. From what you wrote it seems like you're trying to improve things. i think you should be proud of that. Please do keep us updated if you can and want to. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @WovenGalaxy, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

Aw, thanks @MickeyCheeky !!! You are very wise. I talked to my guy friend bc I thought maybe he was mad at me. He was not. Lol. It helped to "check things out," so to speak.

I went to my pottery class today. It was...interesting. First day jitter kind of thing. The teacher was nice, but not very attentive to the newbies. It was also very messy, lol. Not bad. I learned a little lol.

It’s not a bad thing to disagree/debate with someone, as long as you can both stay respectful and really listen to each other (not saying you wouldn’t, but I’ve found it hard! Lol!). If you feel hurt by some of his comments I think it’s worth talking about it. Your feelings matter and it could also improve the friendship.
I did ceramics/pottery classes as part of my college course. Still got a couple of my pieces, too! I kinda hated it, to be honest lol - how did you find it?

@RoxanneToto the class was ok. Its not my thing but I'm likely going back next week.

Yeah I agree its ok to disagree. Bonus points for respectfully.

Well, even if it’s not your thing it’s good that you’re trying it out. I hope you get something out of it!

Today I hung out with a different female friend of mine. I'm glad we did. She's very kind and she has some of the same mh issues as me. Though our issues differ a bit too. I am just really happy to have spent time with her today. It had been a long time since seeing her.

I have been slacking pretty terribly on one of my volunteer gigs: I call this woman, a senior, twice a week, and I didn't call at all this week. I have been doing this gig for over a little over a year, and very religiously. I don't know what's up with me. But I need to be there when I say I will be and I haven't. My poor excuses: I've been busy, preoccupied, stressed, depressed. I am going to call my supervisor next week and ask what I can do to apologize to my senior. Maybe I can reduce my time to 1 call a week, too.

I walked 4 miles today by the lake. Woohoo!