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Default Jul 19, 2021 at 03:16 AM
  #1
I have my birthday soon and am grateful for many things in my life. I have a job, am relatively mentally stable, am living a good life, and am in pretty good health overall. I could want more but am grateful for what I have. I have not bought new stuff recently like clothes or shoes. But, I have enough to get by and look healthy since I sleep well, eat relatively healthy, and walk all over the place. I don't drink nor smoke. I am happy overall. I do have bills to pay still and have to work. But, I'm living a relatively good simple life. I still have problems with men but this is not anything new. I am trying to work on this by devoting time to myself.

So, today I went out to eat and ate an expensive meal with dessert and coffee. Tomorrow, I will eat out again by going to the fashion district here and enjoy myself. Day after tomorrow, I may eat out again and try a new dish somewhere.

I take my medication daily and just came back from the psych doc who said he is happy I"m doing well. So, he wants me to see him in two and a half months. I am happy.

I was homeless once so really appreciate what I have now. I remember not being able to find anything to eat and not being able to pay for food. I was broke and sleeping on benches. Now, I think with covid-19 I would be dead if I was homeless now. It was my fault I became homeless. I stopped taking my medication and became psychotic. I don't know how I recovered but it took me some time to get back on my feet.

I want to earn more money if possible so am thinking of ways to earn money legally. I feel I can do this now since I am relatively stable.

Life is not bad and is pretty good. I feel happy that my life is on the right path again for now. I had some breaks this past year but continued taking my medication. I did the right thing because I recovered with only a slight psychotic break, instead of a full-blown psychotic break.

I also wanted to thank the people who write on this forum. You have helped me to think about my actions critically as well as been supportive of my decisions.

I could rant about how lonely my life is but it is really not that bad. I have my family still who talk to me daily and some acquaintances who help me pass my time.

I feel good about myself. Of course, I could obsess over my mistakes again and again. But, I've come to terms with my illness and accepted that I am fallible and make mistakes from which I have gained insight.

Life is a journey, not a destination. I have been to many places and in many situations. But, I am now accepting of myself and my illness.

Thank you all! And, may the good times roll!
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Default Jul 19, 2021 at 05:04 AM
  #2
Good for you, bpforever1!

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Default Jul 19, 2021 at 04:38 PM
  #3
Thank you for the hugs and message!!
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Default Jul 20, 2021 at 02:10 AM
  #4
I ate a nice meal in the fashion district today and had a nice parfait with coffee. I also had a nice meal with it. I am happy. My mother scolded me for spending money unwisely. But, I got sick of cooking. I feel great. The weather is steamy here though. I will be watching the Olympics too this week.

I am doing well. My job is not stressful and my schedule allows me to sleep a lot. I feel wonderful.

I made some acquaintances who text me periodically. So, I feel as if someone cares.
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Default Jul 20, 2021 at 04:42 AM
  #5
It's so good to hear all this, bpforever!! I think of you a lot. I am so proud of you!!

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Default Jul 20, 2021 at 04:49 AM
  #6
Dear Breaking Dawn,

Thank you so much for your support!! You are also amazing for having such compassion for others. It simply amazes me that people such as yourself fight the good fight yet have something in them to give to others still. Thank you for your kind words!! It is because of people like you that make me smile in this world.
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Heart Jul 20, 2021 at 05:08 AM
  #7
Oh my goodness, dear friend, thank you! The same thing back at you! Lots of love to you!!

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Default Jul 20, 2021 at 05:37 AM
  #8
Dear Breaking Dawn,

You are too kind. Bless your heart!!

Smiles from ear to ear!!
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