[Fuzzybear]

I have (also) had people in real life with power over me who have broken and shattered my trust.

It doesn't make me ''weak''... it makes them abusers in a position of ''power'' and they are not fit for the job

Maybe they need this?

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm sorry, dear Fuzzybear. They are out there, no matter what, aren't they. We can try to keep away from them, but sometimes life happens & there it is. Thank goodness we have our wonderful place here & each other.

[DoroMona]

Sorry you're going through this FuzzyBear. I've been posting about issues I've been having with a colleague. In the context of your post, he has power over me (he used to be my boss, now maybe he's just a colleague but he's still 30 years older than me and I defer to many of his decisions and opinions) and I feel he recently betrayed my trust. As a result, I've been angry for several months. What I want to add is that I also know it was unintentional, that he's actually a really nice person, that he's been my friend for years, that conflicts sometimes happen between people even though no one is wanting to be hurtful or destroy the relationship. In the context of my situation, my colleague is definitely on the autism spectrum, is off his ADHD drugs, is dealing with a wife who is going through a major bipolar episode, and in general has always been a chaotic person who can't plan and creates chaos in the group.

So what I'm trying to say I guess is that there are people who are just bad people and don't value others or abuse those they have power over, and yes I guess these people need or enjoy the feeling they get from tampering with others. But I think there are also other people who weren't necessarily trying to damage anyone--they were either not thinking, or didn't realize what the consequences would be (for themselves and others), etc. I'm not saying they're good people or that they should get a pass because the damage they caused was unintentional. I just think it's not productive to imagine the world as a place full of evil people. I think the world is actually just full of stupid/careless people...or something...

"Never ascribe to malice what can be explained away by stupidity."

Of course, I don't know the real context of your post. There will be doctors, teachers, parents, etc. all kinds of people we count on to help us in life, and when they drop the ball for whatever reason, the consequences can be devastating...

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

people in real life with power over me

Starting with my parents, those people have been numerous (or so it seems to me).

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

who have broken and shattered my trust.

Hmmm... Many - all? - fell short of idealistic expectations, but at least a few definitely shattered...my view of who they were or of who they pretended to be.

I would tell my younger self to "respect but suspect" those with power and influence over me. "Young Rohag, take care that your natural urge to meaning not enslave you to others' will to power."

[MuddyBoots]

Doesn't make you weak at all, Fuzzy When people abuse their power it's all about them, not you. Best to just distance yourself from these people as much as you can, physically and emotionally.

[mote.of.soul]

Yes, I can relate to this. The inner snake seeks to right the wrongs!🐍🤬🐍

I am sorry they said such hurtful things though Fuzzy. I'd expect such words from your ordinary 'Joe Blows' out there unfortunately, but not mental health professionals. I could say a lot of things about that but I'm trying to be more spiritual these days.

Sending great love to you 🌸((Fuzzybear))🌸

[divine1966]

It doesn’t make you weak trusting people.
Some people are too unwell to behave in a proper manner. They can’t be trusted for that reason. And of course there are people who are simply manipulative and sneaky and must cannot be trusted. But it takes time tk figure it out

[Breaking Dawn]

God bless all of us. So much is so hard. Hurts are felt in so many different ways. We are here together because of Doc John & his other wonderful volunteers. I am so grateful to have all of you, & this place
where we can feel somewhat safe?

Fuzzy never deserves to get hurted

[Fuzzybear]

What we don't need in the midst of struggle is shame for being human.

Brene Brown

[Fuzzybear]

''All tyrannies rule through fraud and force, but once the fraud is exposed, they must rely exclusively on force''

George Orwell

[Fuzzybear]

Today it feels so simple
We are here to take care of each other.
How could we ever forget?
As if soil could forget
it is here to feed the trees.
As if trees could forget
they are here to feed the soil.
How could anything
ever get in the way of generosity?
How could we ever greet each other,
with any words besides
How can I help you?
As if light could forget
it is here to help illuminate.
As if dark could forget
it is here to help us heal.

- Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer