[birdcrazy]

Yeah, I'm self-diagnosing, but reading through personality disorders, this one really jumped out at me, here are the characteristics, I wrote my experiences in blue.

Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive fear that leads to "clinging behavior" and usually manifests itself by early adulthood. It includes a majority of the following symptoms:

• Has difficulty making everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others

I have to talk to at least 10 people probably to make a decision, and still it is hard. But I will admit they are mostly more major decisions rather than everyday.

• Needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of his or her life

It's more like I take advice again. Now I'm handling my own money for example, but I wish someone else was doing it for me.

• Has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval

Yes, I will often agree with something I don't truly agree with to avoid an argument.

• Has difficulty initiating projects or doing things on his or her own (because of a lack of self-confidence in judgment or abilities rather than a lack of motivation or energy)

I've had problems with past jobs because of this. I need so much advice that one of my last bosses said "I've had to hold your hand way to much"

• Goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance and support from others, to the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant

Man I hate gardening, but I did it to be with my friends. My relatives will take advantage of this fact too.

• Feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone because of exaggerated fears of being unable to care for himself or herself

That is how I feel now living independently. I have to be around people all the time to reassure me.

• Urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends

This would be friendship, since I've never been in a romantic relationship, though I crave one.

• Is unrealistically preoccupied with fears of being left to take care of himself or herself

I have fear now that I am on my own, but truthfully I would rather be on my own and comfortable with it.

[horseshoe94]

it sounds like you deffinitly at the least have charisitics of dpd....i can relate a lot with you....especially with needing a friend i always need them...i crave a relationship to but they never go well so i mainly depend on my friends.....

[pudsey]

I can completely understand where you are coming from its hard but im sure talking through our experiences,thoughts and feelings together we will give each other the suppor which we need xx