I'm pretty sure I'm Dependent

I know I need help, I think Dependent Personality Disorder is my problem (after alot of research). My BFF who has partially studied psycholgy believes I have BPD. (Borderline)

I have a baby who is almost 1 year old, and a husband who has cheated on me (while I was pregnant) and no longer wants to be with me. We have to stay together for immigration issues. I cannot be the reason he is no longer with our baby.

Plus, I am hoping in the year or more it takes for him to get his immigration status, he will change his mind and once again want to be my husband. He loves our son and wants to be around for him. And I don't and can't be the one to take that away. But I still love him and NEED him back. And not just due to the fact that I think I have DPD.....

This issue with ME is something going back to when I was even in elemantary school...I could do NOTHING for myself, even my homework. I KNOW it was more than just being lazy. I am often accsued of being lazy, and I know its MORE than that! I can;t make the simplest decisions since I was in Gr.5 and younger...that I can remember,,,if it comes to it, I will leave it until it becomes a problem and even and issue that hurts me before I can even make a decision...and even then I can't!! It's not that I don't want to..I just CANT! Please help! It has runined my 2nd marriage now..and we have a baby...I just want to be able to fix myself!

There are so many complicated issues that I could explain...but it comes down to the fact that I can't do ANYTHING for myself. I stuggle to take care of my baby sometimes, even though I live with my husband and parents! I do what I have to do when it comes to my baby, though sometimes it's a stuggle to do the easy everyday things. It takes me less than 5 minutes to make his milk for the day....but I have to stuggle and PUSH myself to do it.

It's so hard to have the motivation to do what I have to do everyday. It has been like this as long as I can remember. I KNOW what I HAVE to do. and I have ALWAYS WANTED to do it...I just CAN"T!

For years I knew to make my relationship with my husband better, I just had to keeep the house clean, do some meals, do SOMETHINGs for myself instead of waiting for him to do everything for me. (which my mom does while we now live at home). I knew if I didn't it would damage our relationship and it has...
PLEASE help...I need to be able to do things for myself and my family!!! I WANT TO...SO bad...and I just can't make myself do ANYTHING!

Oh. wow, i can relate! I just got my results from a psychologist back today and one of the results was, "Personality disorder, NOS with borderline and dependent features." This made sense to me, and it has been the scourge of my life. I've always found it hard to do anything for myself yet I hated getting help on the other hand. I have really frustrated people with this. Good luck to you.