Struggling with diagnosis

I was diagnosed about a year and a half ago with DPD and AvPD traits. I absolutely hate it and have fought it ever since. The idea of being dependent freaks me out and quite honestly disgusts me. For many years I was afraid of having bipolar because of my abusive father who had bipolar but honestly if I could trade illnesses I would. Now all my providers want to talk about is how my personality disorder is effecting my life, nevermind my depression and anxiety of which 29 meds have yet to properly treat. I'm so sick of hearing about my personality disorder because it feels like a fundamental flaw in my character and something that is inherently wrong with me. Plus, I don't like being around people much with the exception of my mom but even now I'm starting to get really sick of being around her for fear of being dependent. I hate that I'm supposed to be this 20 something year old who can't do anything and what's worse is now it feels like it's my fault. I'd much rather have AvPD because I don't like people and I don't understand people plus I don't like to rely on them. Yet my therapist says that because whenever I get fearful of change she sees me throw up my hands and give it to the nearest person (figure of speech). But I don't see that. I'd say yeah I do oftentimes go screw it but I don't give up responsibility to others. Now I just feel weak and like a burden to others, a waste of space. Not to mention when you read up on DPD it says things like "clinging behavior", yuck! But I digress. Thanks for letting my vent. And if anyone can relate or has successfully gotten through all the emotional crap of this diagnosis and gotten better, please let me know (I'm a tad desperate).