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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2005
Posts: 3,886
19 47 hugs
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#1
This is the second time I have had my hair colored in less than a week. First time I ended up looking like frosty locks! Second time I am only 65% satisfied with the hair color.
I am feeling very dejected and sad because of this and don't know what to do with my mixed feelings of anger and sadness. I don't have much going for me. I have only ever been told that I am cute never attractive or pretty. I am over weight because my meds have slowed down my metabolism. Yes, I could exercise...etc like I have done in the past...but all that happens is that my muscles get stronger and I feel healthier.....but the fat still remains. So when my hair looks odd or awful I tend to get very upset, sad, and dejected. I know that there is more to life than having beautiful hair cuts/colors and that ppl are dying of horrible diseases...etc. I am just feeling very lonely and hopeless. How do I change my thinking so I don't focus so much on the state of my hair and feel more happy or at least content? |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2009
Location: usa
Posts: 1,730
15 183 hugs
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#2
When I already feel awful, it takes very little to make me feel even worse. It's like the filter I see the world through is dark and bad.
If someone messed up my hair color while I was already depressed I would be crying. In a normal mood I would be upset but able to cope with it. I try to cope with it by reminding myself this wasn't my last chance to be pretty (fit, thin,etc), and things really do get better. That usually keeps the crying down to a couple of hours from an all day event. I'm sorry you feel so bad..... __________________ "Unipolar is boring! Go Bipolar!" Amazonmom is not putting up with bad behavior any more. |
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Zen888
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Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 9,092
17 41 hugs
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#3
sorry about the hair. keep trying for it, maybe try somewhere different? I've never had my hair done so not sure.
I think excercise would be good - muscle building is a very good things not just for health but for looks. My bf has told me that when I actually used to play my cello 4+ hours a day he really liked the way my arms looked because of the muscle in them... so I really do think it makes a difference. __________________ Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. |
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Zen888
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Member
Member Since May 2009
Posts: 149
15 |
#4
Zen,
You have the right to go back to the salon and demand that the owner or someone more experienced fixed your hair! Hair can be a big thing for females. I know it is for me. I can get very depressed if I don't feel like they have done a good job with the color. Don't settle, go back and have them fix it. Remember, too that everything gets magnified when one is feeling depressed, so try to look at that, as well. Good Luck and let us know how you are doing. Slick |
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Zen888
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Posts: n/a
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#5
((Zen)))))))))))))) my friend. Can you give your hair a week maybe . See then when you are feeling better if that makes your hair look better to you. Sometimes when depressed nothing looks good to us. I do understand the hair thing thou. 65% likeing it is almost there.
I was wondering can you talk to your Dr about your meds and see if they can change it so it will not slow your metabolism down. Or is there a way to speed it up alittle. I know when my son had a issue with weight he went to the gym and lost a ton. He also had did it a way so there was not too much muscle gain. I do not really understand it Also was wondering if maybe because you are not feeling good about yourself . maybe your weight is ok. Any how if exerciseing makes you feel heathyer thats a good thing you are a kind and caring person. one more thing ...a different hairdresser? some do goof |
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Zen888
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Veteran Member
Member Since Apr 2008
Location: Northamptonshire, UK
Posts: 420
16 |
#6
I for one think that it's absolutely nasty when someone says: "Get over it...just consider yourself lucky that you're not starving or dying". The fact is, a problem: no matter the size, is nevertheless a problem. And problems make people feel like absolute s***.
What I say is be confident in yourself. Why not scour the web for a hairstyle you like, print off the picture and take it into the salon. You never know, you might really be able to doing something beautiful with your hair. Even if you can't find a style or you don't want to risk it, why not try dying it another colour ? I know that keeping to try finding a right hairstyle is a NIGHTMARE. But just ya know go crazy and get a stunning colour (like bubblegum pink hehe). Whatever you decide to do...HUGS! OXO __________________ .
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Zen888
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2005
Posts: 3,886
19 47 hugs
given |
#7
Grandma Muffy
Trust me when I say I am over weight! In the 10 years since I have been on medication, I have gone from a size 4-6 in jeans (Canadian/American sizes) to 16 in jeans! And my bra size has gone up dramatically, I could craddle a cat in my bra! I don't even wear pants/jeans anymore. I wear long skirts. For my physical exam this Summer I will ask my family doctor to recommend a nutritionist or dietition (excuse my spelling). Thank-you for your concern and understanding! |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,611
17 |
#8
I don't really know what to say. I know how bad I feel when I don't feel happy with how I look. It can be so uncomfortable. How comfortable you are with how you look is a big deal so don't make yourself feel worse by putting yourself down for being upset by your hair color. Most women take that pretty seriously!
I cut my own hair and on Sunday I accidently shave part of my head bald! I've been pretty upset but what's done is done. At least my hair grows fast. I, of course, had to shave my whole head bald once I shaved part of it that way. I'm trying to keep a sense of humor about it. And I wear a hat when I go out in public. But I feel like I don't know which is uglier, my bald head or the hats. Hair color can be fixed, if you have the money. If you can afford it, maybe you should treat yourself to a really good hair colorist. You might be surprised at the ideas s/he comes up with. Meanwhile, I'll be watching my hair grow... __________________ I'd rather have a visit, note or pretty picture than an "I'll say a prayer" or a "god bless you." Doesn't make me feel better, no meaning to me for sure. Can't stop you from praying and blessing me, and if that makes you feel better feel free. But keep it to yourself please, don't tell me. And let's all respect each other's feelings. With kindness, support and "sweet dreamings." |
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turquoisesea
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