I could disappear and....

I could disappear and who would care....no one...T (it's just a job for him), family (they have already abandoned me)...husband (he doesn't get anything with mental illness, he would be happy if I'm gone)...son(he just loves me so yeah, I think he would miss me)...friends here and irl (I'm just the burden that everyone wants to go away....

tryingtobeme.
I think that you need a cyber hug from a total stranger ((me)), I'm sorry you are feeling this way, what's hurting the most?

(((Tryingtobeme))) - I'm so sorry you're feeling very sad and troubled. Most of this is just the depression talking. I don't want you to disappear and I'm sure many others, especially your son don't want you to either. Your son needs you, even if you're not feeling well. Take some slow deep breaths and know this is just the depression telling you lies. I hope you feel better.

Hurting...maybe dead is a better word. That is what I feel like. very lifeless and completely dissociating.

I'm so sorry that you are feeling like this way. I'm here if you need to talk, sending you well wishes and hugs.

You're PC family would miss you, if no one else. Hang in there.

((((tryingtobeme))))

Burden?

Well, here, you are far from being a burden. You serve to give poignant voice to stirrings that occupy many of our hearts - even to the feeling that we are a burden. How many of us in trying to answer you are seeking to answer themselves?

Tryingtobeme, were you to disappear, it would impoverish all of us who see your name and avatar, and who wish with every reply there were a way to transmit our words directly to you rather than just to your screen.

((((((( Tryingtobeme! )))))))

You're not alone...I feel the same way most of the time...that it won't matter if I disappear. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in feeling the way I do. You're not a burden...in fact you have helped me. Knowing that I'm not alone in feeling the way I do makes it a little bit more bearable for me. Thank you for sharing how you feel...don't disappear!

I feel that way too...a lot. But then I sit down..take a deep breath and think about things. I mean really THINK about things. I feel like a burden too but then I realize they couldn't survive without ME. My kids, my husband, my mom . I don't have any friends so no one would miss me there...but a lot of people would. I am sure it is the same way for you. Sit down and really think how they would feel if you were gone. They would be lonely, depressed, sad.......