[robin620]

I've been told by doctors that I'm probably clinically depressed. When I was on an antidepressive for my headaches I felt almost too good. That was my one and only walk on the wild side.

Recently two major opportunities came up only to be taken away about the time I was starting to get used to the ideas. I lost a baby after being pregnant for about a month and an opportunity to advance my career has been pushed back at least one more year. Now I'm feeling the depression stronger than before.

My husband tells me I should "just cheer up" but I can't seem to do that. I told him that I can't do that, but he doesn't seem to understand. He says he doesn't want to see me cry, but sometimes that's all I can do.

How can I help him understand that sometimes some people can't just be happy?

[Mike_J]

You can't make him understand any more than he can make you "just cheer up"

Nobody will really understand what it is like to be you, I hate to sound like downer but just the way it is.

But on the plus side that is also what makes you unique and special, there is only one YOU and your existence makes this universe a better place for us all, thank you for being YOU

Hello, Robin. Are you seeing a therapist? Is so, have you husband attend a couple sessions with you to get a better idea of what is going on.

[shezbut]

Robin,

I'd also recommend that you allow yourself to feel grief and despair for a little bit when it strikes.

Then, push yourself to exercise. Go for a bike ride, play tennis or basketball, go to the gym & lift weights. Something physical that takes you out of the misery for a little while.

See a psychologist to talk about how you're feeling emotionally. Maybe you're husband should go with you a time or two, to better understand what you're experiencing. And hopefully prevent resentment between you both. His understanding of your struggles could help you feel a lot better, and would help clear up any misperceptions that he may have in his head.

Best wishes to you!

[Lisa Michelle]

Robin I think anyone would be finding it hard to deal with what you've been through. There is nothing strange about feeling **** right now, you have every right to be upset and depressed over such horrible things. Your feelings are valid, and just because your husband is handling things fine it doesn't mean you should be too, and that you can just cheer up. Who would in such circumstances? You need time to grieve and to get over the disappointment, too.

I know you want things to improve and I think somebody suggested therapy, it might be an option you could take, perhaps it would help you to talk about what's happened and have a reassuring ear/voice?

It seems strange to me that your husband doesn't understand that you feel depressed, I guess he is lucky if he has never felt depression, but it's a common thing and like I said you have a reason to feel low. Maybe if you just talked to him about how you're feeling it would help matters. If it were as simple as choosing to be happy then obviously you would do that.