Unemotional

LittleForgetMeNot · Oct 25, 2010 at 09:19 PM

I've fallen into that unemotional, unaffected, dull, lifeless mind state again. Done with sadness, but unable to reach real happiness. I don't know if I should welcome this, for I don't necessarily feel alive, or if I should shun it for that same reason. My sleeping pattern has messed up again, my idle thoughts are filled with those people who I shouldn't think about anymore, and I've come to the conclusion that I'm cursed and everything that loves me will eventually hate me and there isn't anything I can do to prevent it.

Belle1979 · Oct 25, 2010 at 09:24 PM

((((littleforgetmenot))))

You aren't cursed.. have had similar feelings/thoughts. that anyone who gets close to me ends up dead or leaving me..

Thought are just thoughts, not representations of fact.

Try to treasure the 'peaceful moments' with out the ups and downs.

LittleForgetMeNot · Oct 25, 2010 at 09:34 PM

Well, my thoughts are from experience. All my friends end up hating me for one reason or another.. and I do mean every single one since I was 8 years old. Lately I've been so distanced from everyone that things are awkward or weird. There is only one person who I talk to now, though I attack him constantly with my sad way of thinking, so it's only a matter of time until he is annoyed with me too. ^^;

sugahorse1 · Oct 26, 2010 at 05:54 AM

I distansize myself from friends, because I've realised how they withdraw the moment I'm honest and let them know I feel; how much I need someone to just care for me in my life... but most people cannot handle that.
I'm sorry - I also feel so dissociated and dull right now

LittleForgetMeNot · Oct 26, 2010 at 06:51 AM

yeah that's basically the reason why i did it too. I found that the more distance between us the less right i have to feel lonely or abandoned by them because it would be me backing away before they have a chance to do all those things. plus like you said they cannot handle the pressure of someone who is depressed. all my friends who i made in a prgoram with kids that had trouble going to school.. Well now that im still having trouble they've taken on that role of asking me why im not going, not understanding and telling me i should go.. I hated it when people did that at my school and I thought of all people, these kids would get it cause they were like this too, but no.

LittleForgetMeNot · Oct 27, 2010 at 09:30 AM

Well, still unemotional but now I feel physically ill. Of course this always happens when I go blank. It's like I cannot get away from the pain; if it's not emotional, it'll be physical.

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Belle1979 Poohbah Member Since Nov 2009 Location: Perth Australia Posts: 1,193 14 2 hugs given	Oct 25, 2010 at 09:24 PM #2 ((((littleforgetmenot)))) You aren't cursed.. have had similar feelings/thoughts. that anyone who gets close to me ends up dead or leaving me.. Thought are just thoughts, not representations of fact. Try to treasure the 'peaceful moments' with out the ups and downs. __________________ How I describe myself: Honest, caring, trustworthy, reliable and generous.
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LittleForgetMeNot Veteran Member Member Since Jun 2010 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 742 13 5 hugs given	Oct 27, 2010 at 09:30 AM #6 Well, still unemotional but now I feel physically ill. Of course this always happens when I go blank. It's like I cannot get away from the pain; if it's not emotional, it'll be physical. __________________ ~ to alter your fate, you must be brave and willing to try something new ~
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