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#1
Nov 23, 2010, 09:19 PM
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I'm not normally on this forum but I Just need to vent. I don't care who reads this or what they thing. (Or at least I don't think I do) I had the Doc decrease one med, and now it just has tumbled into the wrong direction. I was happy last week, wanted to do things last week. This week I want to denie that i even exist. I want to denie what is happening in just a few days. I want to denie that I"m even writing this.............. I'm stressed out.... I don't know what to do.... This weather is drving me nuts... being with my parents is driving me nuts.... I want to live on my own, I want to have a T and a real Pdoc instead of just a general MD. I want to stop feeling like this. I think I'm ready to just let this go... but i'm not even sure what I need to let go of? I want to play my instruments but half the week I can with out waking up my dad in the next room over and the other half I can play at any time........ I'm scared of moving twice with in a months time. I need to feel like I can connect to real people but i just can't make the connections. I'm fustrated. and confused all at the same time. How can this be. How can I do this. Should i just increase the meds to feel better. and then tell the doc. I have enough.. I can self medicate if I have to... to do better. All i have to do is take two of them... but will that help me to improve. I don't know. I don't even know if i care enough to improve. I'm surrounded by boxes.... I'm surrounded by mixed emotions... I'm surrounded by things I once loved and now can't seem to do. I just want this to end. all these feelings... I want to feel like myself.... I want to self medicate to feel 100% better. I want to be me again so I can go back to school with confidince. and I just had to vent in order to get over this. I think it's time to improve instead of digress. I want to be me again......... Sorry but I just had to vent. get it out of my system for once. and I want some one that cares to really respond by reaching out and helpingme. and making it so I feel like I can get help again. I'm in hot water....
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#2
Nov 23, 2010, 10:16 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
Here's hoping the hot water cools a bit...
__________________
My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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#3
Nov 24, 2010, 01:00 AM
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Well, I might any way even without his permission. Just want releif.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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