[English101]

I am in my early 20's. I've been depressed for some time (years) and am on Wellbutrin and Zoloft. I have achieved a lot in my life so far; worked hard to get into and stay at the college I wanted to attend, helped start a German Shepherd Rescue and have helped place over 12-15 in the last year, have traveled because of my music, and have an overall good life. However, despite how my life looks like from the outside, I can't seem to be happy. I have guilt over everything and am always apologizing (especially to my boyfriend-thankfully he understands me) for something.
The biggest issue I have had is how I over-think EVERYTHING. I worry too much. I think too damn much. And I hate it. For example, I compare myself to every ex-girlfriend my boyfriend has had. Looks, achievements, sex, you name it and I think about it. I don't know how to quiet my mind enough to not think and compare myself so much. Oh, and of course I have low self esteem and am extremely self conscious and aware of my body and weight. Hah, wonder why?
Yes I realize depression is common, and I know personally that it runs in the family. However, when you're so low that you can't see any hope, you forget that others out there are going through the same thing. So basically, I am asking for advice for those with overworking minds. How do I get my mind to shut up once in awhile,especially when the thoughts I have are hurtful and do nothing but increase my depression?

Welcome to the Community, English101. You are allowing others to define who you are. If someone else tells you a quality of yours they admire, you will find a way to dismiss it. Externalizing your self-concept is an efficient way to ensure a life in the doldrums. Cognitive distortions and negative self-talk are two of the culprits you need to deal with.

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-...e-distortions/
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/fix...e-distortions/
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...-part-the-cure
http://thoughtmedicine.com/2010/04/t...nge-your-life/
http://www.recoveryhope4all.com/negative_talk.html
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...essing-you-out
http://www.psychologytoday.com/print/48485

Does your college have someone at student health you might talk to?

[akekaomen]

I have a similar thinking problem. For me it's over analyzing leading to major anxious situations, but i think the idea of over-thinking is the same. Lately I've taken to counting while breathing. It's a kind of mindfulness technique that just gets you to concentrate on your breathing and counting. When my mind wanders to other thoughts, I gently stop and go back to the counting and breathing.

It sounded hokey to me at first, but I highly recommend it. It's not a cure-all, because as noted above there are other things you need to do (accept yourself for you), but if it can provide some slight relief, it's worth trying. It's what I use to actually do things like radical acceptance (accept the world as it is without judgement - including myself).

[emptybee15]

When you find that answer, English, PLEASE share the secret with me. I've been searching for that answer for over 10 years. You can't google that one.